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Valentines Dating Advice

rated 4.41 / 5 stars
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Comedy - Original

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Credits & Info

Feb 14, 2011 | 12:16 AM EST

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Author Comments

Ahh yes, Valentines Day.
Moans and groans both happy and sad.

I don't have much to say about Valentines Day other than I've had some lame experiences with it.
Had I known of these marvelous tips, I would be knee deep in the ladies right now!

Anyway, I've got a bucket of ice cream, a box of tissues, and "A walk To Remember"
Enjoy yourselves, fellow Newgrounders!

Also, "Michael Davis" is the name a scam artist used on me back in October.
Just in case you're wondering.



Rated 5 / 5 stars


Is it me or does he look like Link from Zelda...

I couldn't hear him in one of the best parts, the part where he says he'll cut her into bits.

The grandma probably was the best part, it surprised me.

Oh, ok. The cat was her grandma's. It took a while for my head to click.

I know this is an animation, but who was the camera guy?

I wonder what it'll be like for every holiday.

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Rated 5 / 5 stars

damm that girl got fucked up

i think i shit my pants


Rated 5 / 5 stars


For Now???

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Rated 5 / 5 stars


All these years I thought it was being sweet, charming, and compassionate in a sane, not-a-nutcase manner, now I see I had it all wrong, the only way to get a women is kidnap her and "visit" her friends and loved ones- you have enlightened me, now I would follow through on your advice but I'm already in jail on charges of mass murder and overuse of sarcasm.

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Rated 5 / 5 stars

Dear Michael Davis,

It has been twenty-two years since I have been able to attract a girl. I have tried everything: dating seminars, love potions, romancing books, and I just simply could not attract the opposite gender! That is, until I watched this flash! I was so inspired, I went right up to my neighbors door and asked her out! We had an awesome valentines day! I gave her chocolates and we watched V-Day films all day! Her favorite movie was Cannibal Holocaust, I could tell because she got really excited and screamed louder as we watched it. Afterward, I dragged her to my room and tried to get a lucky valentine. It was difficult at first, she wasn't getting wet and she managed to untie her hands. BOY! Did she put me through one heck of a doozey! Unfortunately I lost my temper and introduced her to my replica LoZ Megaton Hammer and got all the lubrication I needed! ;) Once I recovered from the amazing sex (My first time!), or "love making" as she likes to call it, we went gardening and she made excellent fertilizer. All in all, the date didn't go AS smooth as I wanted it to, but not bad for a twenty-two year bounce back, right? Plus there is always next time (I have a crush on my sisters friend). Michael Davis, you did what nobody else could do. Everybody turned their back on me but YOU were there YOU. And I will never ever forget this!

Marvus Short Aka. MrGein666, 22

P.S. And to prove it I paid off some of your fine (Even if you are getting life, how could the imprison a genius like you?).

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