First things first, instead of copying and pasting the same critic in both parts, I'll leave my honest and humble critic only to this volume. I see no sense to post the same thing at both parts. And YES, it IS a wall of text. I did not hold myself. I just wrote all I thought because I realy love his works, so if only Shadling reads, that's just nice. In fact, I wrote this for him, at the first place.
It's rather controversial. At first glance, the plot and motivations are awesome and that combined with your art style(that I absolutely love!) boosts the quality to another level. The quantity of details scattered everywhere is just insane, and it's really sweet the way the boxes gets organized and well combined - one invading and taking part into the next. I love you unique style and I absolutely LOVE the gore parts, focusing on dirty and disgusting details, yet libidual, sexually provocative and sometimes arousing. Even the cartoony way the characters get anatomically twisted and disproportional - this would be a critic elsewhere, but added to your art style, it becomes something good. But after the dialog takes part, the character motivation gets fogged. He sure IS utterly frustrated, but after a while, his frustrations lose some strenght and do not convince that much anymore to justify his sudden snap of conciousness.
However, some other points need to be made. I know that it was meant to be a one-shot, but it ended up not being, so some adaptations would be welcomed. The first part is too slow peaced when it comes to story progression. There's too much focus on details of the history that didn't need that much attention, and on some ocasions dialogs that didn't need to be there at all. The red parts, marked by the main character's maculation, is sometimes really instinctively clear, but in other ocasions it induces doubts - Is it really happening? How deep was the character into that? What really happened? Yet most of the times these red boxes ended up really well-planned.
Another thing is, the lack of focus on some main events that lead the story as a whole. Such as the rape and the fight. Both of them started and ended too quick. There was no need for such haste. You could have done a greater work just adding more of you. More of that mind-sick lust(that is your greater trademark!), more bloodlust, more of that innermost utter depravation. This is your trademark, and I absolutely love the way you do it in other arts and flashes. But I, personally thought that there wasn't quite enough(mostly on the rape part).
And my last point is: The ending. The story got in a amazing rush, really exciting. But then, suddenly, it ended. And the worst was that the end of the story invalidated past events. Why did he killed himself after raping her? He was so rage-driven that i believe this would never happen. He should have used her as a hostage and get out of the building. I believe you spent so much time on small details that it ended getting too exhausting to continue.
Then, I humbly finish my critic. I really love your work and I really enjoyed the comic, so I had to write what I think about it. I hope my words are not misunderstood, Shadling.
Good job, dude (; I would love to see a continuation, a retelling or a continuation. This plot really have all it's needed to be a great 6 parts of comic, or maybe more. I can't wait to dive into another comic work of your. Hurray (:
(I would give a 3.75, but that's not possible, so it feels like more of a 4 c:)
i would have liked this if it was just the fight with the coworker, rape shit disgusts me.
the only problem was the sax he worked soo hard for didn't last very long. too short. but still a great comic 4.9 out of 5
Great one, I like your style. Just one thing - you must focus a bit on important stuff such as fight with jerk (a page more, showing in his eyes, I think no one would be satisfied with fast death, of someone who bothers you so long) or raping that girl... It was like nothing happened.
The only thing that prevented me from giving this submission a perfect score was the ending. The guy should not kill himself. Instead, the girl should fall in love with him because the rape was so good and she could not resist the pleasure. Anyway, it was a fantastic movie, I almost gave it a 10.