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My second submission.
Thanks to everyone who contributed!
The animation was top notch, there's no denying that. Visually, this video was very impressive. However having said that, the writing was atrocious. Some of the dialogue made me want to rip my ears off, I'm sorry to say. Maybe it's because I'm not particularly fond of cheesy fan-fiction or fan-fiction at all for that matter and this is about as cheesy as fan-fiction gets without getting into the Adult Only stuff. I just think you're mashing too many fictional worlds together. ...not that you can't make it work mind you. If you're going to continue this, I'd recommend taking a little more care when writing the characters dialogue, and maybe watching that your evil empire isn't to cartoonishly evil. ...unless that's the effect you're going for.
I like the part when
I like the part when I scream and fall over. Do you know how many screams I had to.... scream. They all sounded dumb and then I just did that one and I was like YAY!
The voice acting it's really good and the different camera angles and shaky camera makes the actions scenes more intense. I also liked how it has an original story instead of going for the usual stuff people have done before. One thing you could improve it's the background music because in some parts it was missed and could've helped the atmosphere in key moments. Good job...I'll be sure to watch the following episodes.
The voices are pretty well done! And the clash of different characters is pretty interesting.
couldn't have it any better
A kid named Johnny has to stop the destruction of his city.
The creation of Jay Donaldson, Kegel gets into all sorts of trouble!
Possibly the most evil cartoon series on the planet.
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