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TNYG Anime Teaser

rated 2.65 / 5 stars
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Credits & Info

Feb 27, 2010 | 12:31 AM EST

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Author Comments

An original anime I created, "Tenshi No Youna Gakuen" translates to "Angelic School for Boys". The series is about a group of boys who have died and are now in training to become angels in order to protect the living.

This took like, all day -_-;; it was fun though, I learned stuff. Created in Flash 8 and Photoshop, btw.

Apparently, I'm a natural at making people bleed and cry >>;;



Rated 3 / 5 stars

Your backgrounds need to be..

I see a white line where you think the edge is, and I think you miscalculated it and filled in a little less than what you were supposed to.

It's a good idea for future animations to go OUTSIDE the edge of the animation window with your color. This way, these "white lines" where you miscalculated won't appear. It will look like a whole background, and not a cardboard cut-out.

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Rated 1.5 / 5 stars

Holy shit

I'm so sorry but this is fucking hilarious. I know it's not meant to be, but I'm laughing my ass of right now. Just think for a second what you've done, in about 30 seconds you've fulfilled almost every cliché in anime. We have the crying, the wing, the disproportionately large sword, the burning city, the melancholic emo tone, the overly dramatic music, the red eyes, fucking everything. I know you just started, but try going for something a little less....standard (or at least try and make it look good)?

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pancakery responds:

OMG, I didn't even realize o_o;; I know angels are super cliche, and crying, but I wanted to try the emo tear to see how well I could animate it :D Didn't think of the sword thing, and... are melancholy tunes and burning cities cliche? I mean, if it's the "i was away and came home to find my home on fire" cliche, then I could see that, but this is more of a... battle. But I see what you mean, I guess.

I did try to make it look good! I only just found out how to do onion skinning in flash ^^;; My animation skills need work >>;


Rated 2.5 / 5 stars


Ill give you credit for a all day submission, you could of took a little longer in this submission to actually take your time. thus the five star I bet you could make a ten star flash.

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pancakery responds:

I think you're right. I have a different (hopefully better!) technique that I'll do on my next project, and that should make it better :D

Thankyou for reviewing! Its good to know that somebody (other than me, LOL) thinks I can potentially be awesome! Confidence boost, ftw.


Rated 3 / 5 stars

Nice concept

I like the story concept; it's quite unlike any other stories I've heard of before. But, there are a few parts you could polish up on this.

-The art style is nice, but your anatomy could use some work-- namely hands, profile views, and proportions. I noticed the hands looked somewhat rushed. If this was because you didn't want to draw the same hands over and over, that's understandable, but it's advisable that you take some time drawing them anyway, because it will help make your flash look better. As far as profiles go, the jaw should be more defined and convex-- they tend to be blockier in males, and the way you drew the green haired boy's jaw makes it look like it's concave. The ear also looks kind of squished, and the neck also looks a little too skinny. The only big thing I think I should point out about proportions, though, is that the green haired boy's arm was far too short. His elbow should be approximately level with his navel, and his hands should come down to about the middle of his thighs. Of course, this is all sort of nit-picky, so if you didn't want to focus on these aspects, that's understandable. I just think you could improve the animation quality by focusing a little on some good solid drawing. :)

-Speaking of animation, the motion you have here is kind of limited. It's pretty choppy, and it seems like you relied quite a bit on pans of still images and stills with a little bit of movement (like the teardrop). I also thought the green haired boy's head turns a bit too quickly to match his mood. Try slowing it down a bit, and draw more in-between frames to make it run smoother. The part when the angel reaches her hand up could also use some work-- her body lost volume when she moved. This makes for some passable yet unconvincing artwork. If you pay close attention to how big something is when you're doing frame-by-frame animation, the overall quality will get better dramatically. :) In the part where the white-haired boy swung the sword, the hand placement on the sword looked kind of awkward, not to mention the swinging of the sword went by too quickly to properly register what happened. Also, when he gets those shocked-looking eyes, I think it would help a lot to put in some head movement to help communicate and exaggerate the state of shock he's in. It'll really help your audience connect with your characters, too. In the fire scene, I think it would have helped to put some movement in the fire to make it look more convincing. the static image made it look more like a painting than anything. I liked the motion tween, though.

I don't know what to think about the choice of music. On one hand, it fits the theme really well, but on the other hand, it's not the kind of music one would expect in an anime teaser. It's kind of like hearing Beethoven's "Moonlight Sonata" for a dramatic fight sequence. On one hand, it's really emotional, but on the other hand, well... you get the point.

-Finally, your Japanese is a little off. "Tenshi no you na gakuen" Literally translates to "An academy like an angel." A better English-to-Japanese translation could possibly be "Tenshi no danshi gakuen," but even that is a little iffy. My Japanese isn't the best. ^^;

Overall, it's a pretty neat anime teaser. It has a good premise and it's emotional, but the technicalities could use some work. Other than the things I pointed out, though, I like it. ;D

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pancakery responds:

I'm not great at japanese, but I looked it up and 'tenshi no youna *something*" meant 'angelic smile", that is, tenshi = angel, youna = like, ic, therefore angelic, and gakuen I meant to take as boys academy, because in Hana kimi, it's Ohsaka Gakuen, which is ohsaka boys academy... I just put two and two together. Thanks for the rework though :D

In fact, thanks for the review! Taking the time to type it all up, I really appreciate that :)

For the song, I aws going for the emotional-type battle sequence. I guess I didn't really pull it off as well as I was hoping -_-;;

I will work on my anatomy! I think for my next video, I'll do part of it in one day, another part of it the next day touching up on what doesn't look right, and so on, until it's done. That way I shouldn't get bored doing the same thing over and over again but sliiightly different.

Yay technique!

Thankyou! Your review was super helpful :D