I don't see why the rating is so low. I mean, I will admit it's too long. It still has some good jokes. Rina-chan as writer? That was interesting. I enjoy seeing Sonic from "Brawl Taunts".
Yep, that's the exact same design. Scoot is such a great artist. It is of course much lower quality than most of your stuff. It does feel like a poor man's Brawl Taunts. Just make it shorter.