THIS GAME SUCKED TURKEY DICK!!! I'D RAWTHER SUCK A FUCKEN CHITTERLINKS MARLECULE THAN PLAY THIS SHIT LOAD OF FUCK!!! FUCK THIS GAME WATCH IT GO!!! I PLAYED THIS ON THANKSGIVING AND MY MOM GOT SO MAD SHE BEAT ME WITH A GUN (SHE'S ALLOWED TO HAVE HER RIGHTS!) NOW, IF I WAS PLAYING A MORE BETTER GAME SUCH AS THEREIN "TURKEY TAKE FLIGHT!!!" MAYBE MY BELOVED MOMMY WOULD BE ABLE TO ENJOY A COLD PBR (OR BLACK) AND SIT WITH HER PERSIMMONS INSTEAD OF BEAT THE TURKEY SHIT OUT OF ME. ON THIS DAY OF ALL DAYS? NEEDLESS TO SAY I WAS ON THE TRAIL OF TEARS TO THE CORNER (OF WHICH I FACED PUNISHMENT! MIND YOU!!! ALL I DID TODAY WAS PLAY THIS GAME AND IM A GUY FOR CRYING OUTLOUD!!! THIS GAME FUCKS YOU HARDER THAN LIFE ITSELF. I WONDER AND SIT IN AWE AT THIS GAME'S SHITLINESS, IT HAS THAT DISTINCT "POPBRAIN" FEEL AND AN INTERESTING TIME. I'D RATHER GATHER CRYSTALS TO STOP WARLORDS THAN PLAY THIS MISERABLE SHITLOAD OF PUKE UP A DONKEYS ASS WHAT A SHITLOAD OF MOTHERFUCKING BULLFUCK, THIS IS TANTAMOUNT TO SACRILEGE TO THE "NELOVED THANKSGIVING IP!!!" THIS PROVES TO ME WITH OUT A SHADOW OF INTENT THAT JESUS LEGALLY CHANGED HIS MIDDLE NAME TO "FUCKING" WHEN I TOOK THE HILLBILLIES COMMAND CENTER I THOUGHT, "HMMMM THANKSGIVING IS REALLY THE PILLAR OF AUTUMN," NOW, WHEN I WAS YOUNG BOY MY FATHER TOOK ME INTO THE CITY TO SEE THE PROVERBIAL "TURKEY TOM" (NOT TO BE CONFUSED OR DISUADED WITH THE HOMOSEXUAL YOUTUBER WHO DECRIES BAD EGG YOUTUBES) I THOUGHT TO MYSELF "DAMNNNN, I LOVE THIS SEASON OF GIVING THANKS, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT IM NOT GIVING THANKS FOR??? THIS SHITTY FUCKEN (GAME)! I HOPE THE CREATOR OF THIS GAME IS DEAD, HIS FRIENDS ARE DEAD, HIS FUCKEN PETS ARE BEING SKINNED ALIVED, HIS MOM IS A FUCKEN WHORE, YOU SUCK AT LIFE THE WHOLE WORLD HATES YOU YOU'RE GOING TO HELL, LIVE WITH IT. GAME OVER.
ANYWAY I GOT SO PISSED OFF AT THIS SHITLOAD OF FUCK I WROTE A SHORT STORY AND IT GOES LIKE THIS:
"A family, a mom, a dad, a brother, a sister, a baby & grandma, grandma's just there for fun. They walk into a town agent's office and they tell the agent "We got a great act for you. It's gonna knock your socks off." and the agent goes "No, we don't do family acts, they're too cute." and the dude goes "But this is cute in a way that you've never seen before, you're gonna like this." The agent says " Alright, you've got 2 minutes, let's see what you've got."
The mom and dad start confusly making out and the agent goes "A weird start, but i'll stick with it, it's not so bad." Well, wait until the kids start going at it, too. Tongue and cheek, literally. And the sister starts to fist the dad, and the mother starts to eat out the boy's asshole.
Pretty soon, the whole family is locked in a terrible orgy where there's no escape from it. They've reached the point of no return. And as the orgy is happening, they begin to rotate. Even the baby is being used as a dildo. They're all rotating, except for grandma who is outside the rotation of orgy, because someone's got to be there to lick the dirty parts as they go by. And now there's just sweat and cum and piss and blood because things get crazy, but it's okay because they're all related so it's fine.
Now the agent, the agent's already called 911 by now. He started dialing when he noticed the son sticking a glass rod up his penis and bending it like a glowstick, you just hear a handfull of pops and he fucks his sister with his little tiny baby dick. She's not loving it. He gets a little too excited and he cums the bloody cummy glass shards into his sisters child cunt (that wasn't part of the act) Meanwhile mom's blowing dad right infront of the kids. Grandma's eating out the baby's asshole, the baby's eating catfood.
By now it's probably a good time to say the mother is retarded, but not just exceptably retarted: wheelchair retarded (which is great because those one's drool alot so you always got a loophole, which is exactly what they where using.) Wasn't sure which one she hated more. Literally every body fluid you could think of was smeared across this poor agent's office, especially the tears.
Grandma gets up on top of the agent's desk and pulls out a crossbow and she shoots a grapling hook into the cealing and repels down of the desk across the room pussy first on the grandson's dick. They both fall over. He cracks 3 ribs, he dies. His last breaths where sucked out of him by the orgasm shooting his little cumload up inside grandma. Meanwhile dad's busy punchfisting the dog's front but. Mom's smearing her shitty colostomy bag all over her devoloping tits. The baby's head also came off somewhere along the way.
The dad picks it up and you might be thinking "Oh, a decapitated baby!" but the dad's thinking "Oh, a new hole!" And what do we do when we see a new hole? Make it bigger! Here's where it gets gross: By now mom has fallen out of the wheelchair and she's convulsing on the ground because somepoint during the act she missed her dose. They put the headless baby's corpse into the wheelchair and they tie a long ribbon across the room and they use it as a slingshot to sling the baby out of the window. It barely missed the agent's head. The brother's penis is inside of the daughter but he's not attached to it, she cut it off and she's using the blood as tribal paint around her face. You can't tell the difference between the brother and the sister at this point.
The daughter pulls out a noose and ties it to the chandelier, puts her neck to it and flat out hangs herself. Obviously the family uses it as a pinata. You can imagine beating a kid with metal bats by the way, you can just imagine softer and softer bits because you're just breaking her into fine bits in the inside. And you can imagine what's dripping on the ground: Different shades of red and green for some reason. Her brother's cum, that's dripping out of her as well. Her brother's spinning her, so all of her fluids shooting across the room. At this point, dad has filled 2 condoms with cum and starts using them as cumchucks on his dead daughter. She's actually not dead yet, she's still dying. The last memory she has his her father's cum in her eye right before she blacks out & the agent goes "I've never seen an act like that in my life! What do you call yourselves?"
The dad limps up to the agent desk like a walmart employee and throws his hands on it and asks "Can i have your pocket knife?" And the agent says "Alright. This man's insane." and he gives it to the dad. And the dad carves "The Aristocrats" into the desk and fills those grooves with cum before taking that pocket knife and slithing his own throat and dying next to his wife who's still breathing unvoluntary because the oxygen tanks are still pumping her lungs.
The whole family's dead at this point, this wasn't even an act, this was a mass suicide disguised as an audition. It's part of their religion. Cops arrive, and the agent gets arrested for mass murder."
ANYWHO ALL AND ALL THIS GAME WAS ALRIGHT AND I HAD A NEAT THANKSGIVING. THANKS A LOT DUDE!