Animal Wars!

Share Collapse

Author Comments

Finally to be released on Newgrounds.
Like Worm games? You should evolve, dude! Angry goats, slimy slugs, fire ants and poopy gorillas wage war against each other. Battle across America, my friends!

Please see in-game instructions.
Mad Science Industries and AddictingGames

PS. Sorry about icon quality!! Will get better one up


Despite what you would think if you believed the most recent 2 comments (which are not from this decade, what the hell is happening to newgrounds, it sure must be dying in recent years, probably due to their tyrannical comment moderation, it's infuriating how they'll purge anything negative said about their preferred crap made my their preferred users), the voices are the BEST. And if you hate it so much, there's a damn mute button. So many damn games don't have a damned mute button but this ain't one of them, it's right there. But why would you want to do that? This is one of the few games I play with the sound on. I like how the ants saying "We'll do whatever it takes" sounds like Satan from Leo and Satan. While "get your hands off me, you're hurting me" sounds like Billy Crystal to me. While "Excellent. Absolutely excellent." that the (slugs? it could be a misplaced voice) say reminds me of Kiff from Futurama. Sometimes it plays an out of place voice, like you're the ants fighting the gorillas and suddenly it plays a sound the sheep say. Speaking of which, the sheep's sounds are the best. "Hoof arted". A classic. An incredibly stupid classic. Though WHAT makes him randy? Ice cream? A screet? What's that?

A very nice worms clone. I remember worms. Ah, the 90s. The time that time should be stuck at. If only I should be so lucky as to be reincarnated back into the 90s Groundhog Day style when I die. I suppose some version of me out there will be.

It is not without bugs, which go far beyond the wrong sound being played. Once in a while you'll throw an object and it will never quite come to a rest, and it will just keep jostling on the ground where it lands slightly and the turn will never end because it will be stuck in an infinite loop. Oh that's unpleasant. There is an issue with the way score is kept. Your score is the number of hit points of damage you cause minus the number of hit points you receive, minus an additional 100 points if you lose a match. And you lose one location of territory when you lose a match, and get one when you win. Put these two facts together, and you can see it's pretty easy to make your score higher and higher and higher by deliberately losing. You set the number of characters per side to 5, you kill 4 and nearly kill the fifth, and then throw the match - you will lose 100 points plus some small number from your score. But when you get it back, you win by a lot, let's say you take 200 hit points of damage and therefore your score goes up by 300, after losing a bit over 100 on the way down. Against the sheep, you're very likely to take ZERO hit points of damage, or maybe just 100 if they hit you once, so that's the opponent to really do that trick against. The highest score I have ever gotten without deliberately losing matches is 2202, but once when I was messing around, I got it up past 5000 by using this method. But you'll find that that first bug I mentioned is very likely to cut your game short and demonstrate to you how much you've been wasting your time if you play to get as high as you can, so don't play that way. Unless you feel like it, just for seeing if you can get a score of 5000 for the heck of it. Also, often you'll hit the enemy, or be hit by the enemy, SO HARD it will fling you high into the air and onto their side. Yet somehow this does surprisingly little damage to you and you survive with quite a bit left and you can then attack them up close.

Maybe it's only easy to do that if you're the ants. The ants are the best, by far, with their cluster bomb picnic baskets. The sheep are the worst. The sheep are TERRIBLE. They're HUGE targets, and their horns, though while one-shotting anything they hit instantly dead, don't bounce at ALL, and the game doesn't count it as a hit unless it's a PERFECT shot. As the ants, which are tiny targets, those sheep horns, you'll think they're going to hit you and it lands ALMOST perfectly on top of you but NOPE, NO HIT, it lands at your feet or right behind you and you're fine. The gorillas and the slugs however are DISGUSTING. So really it's not any fun playing anything but the gay ants (boy are they gay, those are the gayest ants I've ever heard speak at least, which is setting the bar low I'll admit).

Some properties of the game play - each of the 4 species has its own special projectiles. The NPC players will NEVER pick up and use your own projectiles back against you, but you can pick up the sheep horns (why would you want to, they suck) and use them back against them. The gorilla's crap projectiles (I wonder what Koko the gorilla would think of playing this game, I'll bet she'd be offended) and the slug's slug slime projectiles are annihilated on impact though so there's nothing to pick up. But they'll very rarely pick up your picnic baskets (empty though they are, as their insides ARE annihilated on impact) and throw them back at you. I've seen the slugs do it, but only once. I don't know if the others can, but it was only once. I also notice that the contents of the picnic baskets when they fly out of the picnic baskets tend to gravitate toward the individual enemies. It must be programmed in there to help the user aim. So if you throw it too far, the stuff from the picnic baskets will lag behind it, but if you throw it not far enough, they'll go further. This only if they're high in the air though, that they'll head in the general directions of the enemies. They're still likely to rain down all around them without hitting any of them when they get to the ground. On the other hand, it is very much against you with anything bouncing. As soon as something you throw hits the ground, it will more likely than not bounce away from the enemies in a biased way against you, straight into the drink. And you would LIKE the gorillas and the slugs to throw back any projectiles you throw at them (they won't pick up the empty picnic baskets remember, but they will anything else) so you don't WANT them to fall into the water, because their own projectiles are much worse for you. The crap projectiles will not only do a fair amount of damage on impact but lethally POISON any of your characters so they lose 5 hit percentage points every turn until they DIE. While the slug's slimeballs do even more damage, a direct hit or even a close hit causing 50 points of damage, plus that character of yours will not be able to jump or walk except really slowly for several turns then so no jumping to get the picnic basket you want. And the promise of animal wars 2 at the end is just sad at this point. Each species gets its own specialized victoy screen though.

The terrain can also give you a huge advantage or disadvantage. The worst is the first one against the slugs, where you're on this ridiculously convex hill and any nudge will send any or several of them off into the water. The best are either against the rams, as if they weren't disadvantaged enough by their weapon's stupid special ability. The first of their levels, you can have an ant or whatever jump down on top of this metal structure between the two sides, and then the rams will actually often target THEMSELVES since yu can be directly beneath them (technically it's on their side, and sometimes they'll jump down there)

The submit score button doesn't work, sad, but I guess the high scores in most of these games were fraudulent anyway.

Overall though, this is a decently fun game to go back to and play. And that's what's most important. And that's why I'm rating it as I am.

Oh god

For a worms-esque ripoff, this game is poorly designed. However, the voices made me turn it off as soon as humanly possible.

People find this review helpful!

Good game

The game is fun... BUT the voices have got to go! They are out of place and only piss the player off.

People find this review helpful!


um dude it said ADDICTINGGAMES. anyway a pretty decent game. theres another game that is somewhat similar to this game. looking forward for better games like this!

Alright but...

The game is alright...good graphics...but its kinda bug..there some gravity bugs...
So fix that and the game will be better xD

People find this review helpful!

Click on an icon to vote on this!

Credits & Info

3.13 / 5.00

Apr 14, 2009
6:43 PM EDT
More Games