Fail.
The first rule of machinima: Use a capture card. I don't give a crap you put in the description you apologized for not using one. If you don't have one, don't make one! Simple as that. The quality looks like shit, head-bobbing is extremely unnecessary, guns pointing up in Halo machinima looks completely stupid (except for fight scenes of course), and I knew I was just watching gameplay footage of you waggling the analogue sticks all around the fucking place).
Of course, technically machinima IS gameplay footage, but you've got make some sort of cinematic experiance out of it. Just take Red vs Blue or Hard Justice as prime examples.
Keep the camera rested on one player's face, instead of flailing it about all around the fucking place in theatre mode, and you should try and avoid using the third-person view in theater, and and also NOT the first person.
Also, if you think about it, it's also a cut-corners way of making machinima, and if you put that little bit more effort, it will show.
I can't explain everything that you need to do to improve on your crappy machinima making skills, but I'd recommend searching up "DigitalPh33r's guide to halo 3 machinima" on YouTube. Maybe then you'll learn exactly why this is full of fail.
-Noko
PS. And please, don't come coming to me with things like "please stop being so mean if you dont like it dont watch it!".
Well, I might be being a bit mean, but this is what they call "CONSTRUCTIVE criticism" (look it up). This was full of shit, and you need to improve.
Sad but true.