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The War - My 1st Flash...

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Author Comments

This was my first flash Hope You Like it...

Also with the coments... please if you want to leave a 'BAD' comment then please tell me how I could do better rather than saying how 'Shit' or 'Crap' it is... thankyou

I am sorry but i cant put in a preloader at the begining of the movie...(if someone is willing to help please PM me...(RABJAB)

Special thanks to cooliam who helped me with this flash...

Hope you like this and my future games/movies.

[EDIT] By the way... future commenters please remember this was my first flash and I have a few more since then... And Yes... I know it's my only drawn flash but there should be some more soon...

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Needs more work

Well, the basics are there. The coloring of the flash is pretty good, the sound effects are good as well.

But the animations are pretty rough and don't look very good at all. Maybe a higher frame rate would do the trick here.

Also, the graphics don't look good either. The only thing you can do here is to practice. Also, don't be afraid to erase things if you aren't 100% satisfied with them and redraw it. Even if it takes 20 or more tries to get a line right, it really shows in the end.

{ Review Request Club }

Rabjab responds:

Yes I was 100% satisfied at the time because I was a noob...

Needs work

This piece is quite rough around the edges and it will need some work to become more fluid and workable as a finished piece. Good marks for effort though, as it's a start.

You will need to write a better plotline to survive with movies like this, but at least you made it past judgement, so it's heading in the right direction. Perhaps have some of the soilders talking to one another about having someone special back home, for example, before being shot down.

When you come to drawing, try zooming out a little, before using a slightly smaller brush to concentrate the control of the pointer, when you try to draw. Also, you could draw with a tablet, because that gives you much greater control overall.

The one thing I have to say about when the world leader was shot, the cross hair pointed straight at the leader's throat, not at his head 'dead eye', as they say in the business. These little details can make all the difference to how things are perceived.

[Review Request Club]

Rabjab responds:

Thank you for the extremely long comment, that really helps me improve.


Well, well, look who it is...

Unstable. No humor, simple, not the most interesting story in world. At least in was slightly easy to follow.

Was the frame rate at 12? Please adapt to ~18-30, for smoothness. I personal use 24fps. Mostly, the animation was terrible. Background was boring and unfitting. You need a load more practice with Flash before you submit anything else. Very shotty.

Many new animators don't realizes how important using sound is. It really adds feeling and mood to a Flash. Instead of using cheap text bubbles, use voices. It keeps the viewer focused.

One last comment for revenge, ur flash sucks arse!

Have a great day,
~Review Request Club~

Rabjab responds:

Innerchild... I recieved your PM and Thank you...

A decent par

The sound effects were decent, voice acting was a bit high pitched. Could of used a bit more length, animation and detail. But it kept me entertained.

You did an ok job for a first flash.

Rabjab responds:

hehehe, yeah the voices went slightly wrong...

ITs bloody brilliant

do more please another i ill help u collab it plz

Credits & Info

3.08 / 5.00

Sep 13, 2008
1:00 PM EDT