Well first of all, the beeping sound in the pre loader... FUCKING ANNOYING! I made the same mistake of putting a sound on a loop in the pre loader in one of my flashes and that annoyed me and all my friends. I had to turn the sound off while this was loading. Anyway about the flash... Well I found it really confusing and I just didnt know what was going on. The story was... well I dont know I didnt watch the whole thing it just seemed to be the same thing over and over. I have no idea why the file size was so big but that made the beeping in the preloader even more annoying as it took so long to load. Work on your story and you should try and draw your own things and not just use sprites. I know I'm being harsh but if you want to improve your gonna have to be told these things. I dont know if this submission will pass the judging as I find newgrounds viewers quite unpredictable but in my opinion I think you need to improve this before it gets on to the site. So bottom line: imrpove your story, improve artwork, get rid of beeping in pre loader and make it more interesting in general.
I like the preloader!!