Worth the Wait
Pick Up: Act Two was definately worth the wait.
Sure, it's fast paced and frantic, but that's part of the magic of what works so well in this series. It's realistic (to a certain degree regarding speaking in turn at least), and it has quite the storyline going for it thus far.
The art style is very well done and very fluid looking over the First Act. The music helps drive the story as well, and that was the case the first time around as well. This is shaping up to be quite the conclusion, provided the Third Act closes the story out.
Overall, I really enjoyed Pick Up: Act Two. The acting was spot on, and the length was perfect. Here's looking to the next time we visit Hickory, Snow, Trisha, and, yes... that loveable brother, Patrick.
Thanks for the love, I'll be sure to work out all the kinks for when you and Ty take up Act Three.
It's an honour to be involved.
Things I specially liked that I haven't yet told you yet:
The colours and grass at the start
The squiggly lines you use to symbolise 'rage'
The icy breaths
Thevisual noise during the battle
Filters on audio durring Hammerspace/when she's fazed
The way Hickory disappears into particles just as Hammerspace starts
The ending - really positive
Brilliant USB connection drawing
The way Hickory looks when slightly blurred after Snow's cough
The framing with the white above and to her sides
The ending (with Hickory gathering her determination, spitting the blood, then walking on just as the credits begin)
The way the credits come in
The first part of the credits with the 4 sliding text boxes that end in the bg - very stylish
Now onto my major criticisms.
As mentioned, I don't like the lip-synching much. I personally feel you should have sketched some roughs, then put in the voices before drawing the final mouth shapes. As is, words and mouths don't match up and this can add to the confusion - specially when Hickory/Trish are having the discussion. Proper lip synching would be a great visual cue to let us know who's speaking.
Personally I feel that after you added the voices, the whole movie lost a bit of its impact - the brilliant synching of graphics and music just doesn't have the immediate impact it did when no talking disguised it.
I'd honestly love to see a version of both this and the original without any voices - just the music and maybe some sfx with lower volume. Basically just letting us experience the brilliant synching first and foremost. I know it could be done on the same flash with programming (though I don't know the keywords necessary) but having another version of this on your DA (I'm guessing you wouldn't want to make it another submission) with voices stripped would make me a happy guy. Maybe as a Christmas present for me?
A few sections were slightly sub-par graphically. Having watched the final movie I'll point out the bodybag just at the first attack (no shadow or anything makes it look really flat and unnatural) the scene with her pushing the driver's foot away abd the fact that when we see trish from upside down during the cough, the line width totally changes - you could've had more sensitivity to tthat).
Maybe you could stand some practise drawing folk from odd angles? Life-drawing classes/DrSketchy's?
Lastly, though both voices were brlliant, Lunacatz did have a bit of noise.
It's a brilliant submission and I'm frankly shocked to see it scoring as lowly as it has. I can only hope that it'll soon rise up to the score it deserves.
It's an honour to be on the credits list for the submission. Regardless of the score, when both acts are watched together, it's obvious that this will be a story full of sheer brilliance. I obviously hope you continue to advance your skills and that the final episodes match up to the promise.
Don't spend so long on the next episode though! Take a long break first and get your speedy mojo in order!
Much love, hugs and kisses.
Stay funky - Bez
I gave this submission a vote of "5"
Wow, I dont care what NGs say, this flash pwns my 32-bit tournament movie!
I have seen part 1 and this was just even better.... I mean, WOW!!!
Keep it up and make part 3, I shall be sure to vote 5, if its good lol!
it was too rough for my liking, too quick and lacked polish. it has great potential but i think was just a bit rushed.
Why is the score so low?
Lower than a four? Man, what's wrong with NG, this was too good for this site anyways I guess. The only thing that needs work is making the action sequences a bit clearer. Slow them down a bit, make the dialog easier to understand, make some slow-mo's here and there...etc. That's all I can think of, but it's still worth a 10/10 despite this small flaw.
Great job! Keep it up!