sound would be nice

it was a good flash but it really needed sound

IT NEEDS SOUND!!!!

This would be great if it had sound and was a little bit longer.Try harder next time.

Not having sound really ruined this

The graphics were great, you don't need much more work in that department. It was a good flash for your eight year old sister and i'm sure that she found it stimulating and enjoyable. But Newgrounds is not made up of eight year old sisters. So in future I would suggest that you not submit something that doesn't have some kind of sound. If you don't have a mic or something then at least put music in it.

Also the white edges were very annoying, made the project look incomplete. Try looking up the vcam in the Newgrounds forum search. It's a helpful tool that will allow you to fade in and out of scenes and move around the flash interface with tweens. Just try it, please.

Also the story itself needed some work. They way things jumped around was a little confusing. It was understandable of course, just some of it could have used smoother continuity.

Overall it was a well done first flash, expecially for your little sister, but in the future I hope to see sound, a more cinimatic feel (no white edges), and smoother flowing flash.

Good luck, don't give up!

Needs sound!!

The graphics are good, but you need sound and a better story. But if this is your frist flash I think you did ok. Good job and keep up the work!