Alright, first off, I think the whole story and idea behind it are great.
But, don't get me wrong here, it's just boring the way you told it. The story on itself: superb. The way it's told: bad.
Let me explain what's wrong:
- grammar and spelling mistakes
- way too long, too many repeats of the same thing. I continuely had the feeling that things you used 4 or more sentances for could be described in 1 short sentance.
- the plot could be seen coming from a mile away. I think it would be more of a tear-jerker if you could make it so one doesn't expect the sad ending.
- You tried to use too much emotion on the character. I think, to me atleast, it would 'feel' sadder if that part was left to the imagination of the 'reader'/viewer.
I liked the book, especially when flipping the pages, very much. Did you draw that or did you use AS? About those buttons with MC's in them you placed all over the place: it's a very good idea, and most of them were great, but some were just a tad... childish. Like the ambulance sound, and the falling tears. That kinda ruined the 'sad' mood.
Alot of whining here, but that's only because this has alot of potential and I'd hate to see that not being used as well as it could be.
Good luck on your next animated book/animation!