right

i blammed this cause i almost fell asleep
i love the music, and great animation, yet no point to making this video
-nerdfersure

a great first flash

Clearly you have some skill and knew to develop a decent flash before submitting it. Good. This said, many of the effects utilized are not used to their best advantage, as I am sure you know. Also, the graphics, while good, are a bit simplistic and redundant. The same can be said for the animation, which seemed to come to a terminal point several times during the flash save for the music (watch it without sound to see what I mean-- the story seems over, but then it goes on...)

The sound is really disruptive when contrasted with the music. It's a real mismatch. A different musical piece should be used, or a different animation should be made, depending on whether you chose music to complement your animation or made drawings as a music video.

The story is very weak. Barely acceptable as a music video background, it seems to have no well defined linearity, no point, no good progression or terminus. It appears as a series of almost random images strung together by a most tenuous story as one might expect as an afterthought in a music video for example. I don't deny a story is present, it simply needs to be focused and strengthened to improve.

However, good job! It was actually quite good and better than the majority of new submissions.

keep it up

i can see that you have some skillz thats pretty good for a first flash your art style fit with the song and overall it was a good effort on your part keep up the good work but try to rely less on shape tweens unless it's necessary (or if they make an effect work the way you want it but still looks good)

...

for your first try i thought that was really good ! keep up the good work.

Awesome

Wow, I did not expect this to be so sweet. The only problem that I found with the art wass that when the bullet was falling it was pretty jerky. Needs to be more flowing there. But once that scene was over it was smooth again. Perfect.

The music was a little quiet, but other than that you have a great art style and I look forward to seeing more.