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Castlevania Priest Battle

rated 2.98 / 5 stars
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Credits & Info

Jul 31, 2001 | 11:08 PM EDT
  • Daily Feature August 2, 2001

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Author Comments

In the NES game parody of ours, Simon is back in town after killing Dracula in Castlevania 2... but now he finds that the priest won't even restore his health! It's quite obvious that this shit-talkin' priest needs to be taught a lesson or two!

Controls are:
Z = Jump
X = Whip
Click or Spacebar = Start

(if you have problems controlling the character, just click on the game and the problem will resolve itself

And don't forget to return to town after you beat the game, because there's a "Secret Button" on your keyboard that you'll DEFINITELY want to push while you're in town! >:) You WILL need to CLOSE THE WINDOW and re-open the game to return to town just so you know. And you DON'T have to beat the game to access the secret item, but isn't it more fun to save it for last? And it doesn't tell you what the secret button is, you gotta figure out that for yourself! ;)

Enjoy the blasphemy of Priest Battle!
If you want to play it without the newgrounds pop-up ads or download it, you can get it at:



Rated 4 / 5 stars

Cute... real cute...

I own every caslevania game. this wasn't all that bad.


Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

Jesus or Not, it's still funny

An opinion of Jesus Christ is not conveyed here -- it's merely a game. Perhaps is metephorical for someone's spiritual journey away from organized religion...or maybe it is just a game where you use Simon Belmont to beat up Jesus on a floating cross for the sake of satire and/or shock value. In the end, it doesn't really matter, because if you're going to go around and make a point of a person's future location in the afterlife just because of a flash game, you seriously need to re-evaluate your logic and where you values are. If you truely adhere to the teachings of Jesus and Christianity as a whole, you know better than to be a jerk and not take a joke. "God surely must have a sense of humor; just look at the platypus."

Oh, the game. Good and stuff. Yeah.

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Rated 4 / 5 stars

Damn priest deserves it

Hey, i'm Christian also, but you don't see me complaining about Jesus dying for our sins and all that. Don't like the game, don't play it then. I think its the funniest thing i've played on the internet all summer. There's nothing better then a good Jesus beating :)

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Rated 5 / 5 stars

good game

i just wish that you could kill jusus a bit easyer


Rated 4 / 5 stars

After watching this, I gotta go to church

If you've seen any of my reviews, I am a hardcore conservative, Catholic, racist, bigot and I'm only 15, but I think this is pretty funny. Prolly one of the best games on Newgrounds.