hey I can relate, but for different reasons...
I am suicidal but not because of my appearance.......I am suicidal because of my fucked up past and the fact that I've been fucked up in the head since I was born......I believe this is because everyone in my mom's side of the family has some kind of mental illness.........to make matters worse, my mom was never there for me, though when I was little, I was there for her while she was getting drunk all the time and I have to put up with her verbal abuse every day........and trust me, she is a cruel bitch.........whenever she is pissed, she takes it out on me with her psychological war-fare and her cruel, verbal abuse........she can't even stand me being happy for so much as a couple of hours........and she also disapproves of everything I do..........in the past week, I have attempted suicide countless times...........and nobody can save me, I am too lost to be saved.........also, I have to live with childhood memories of her throwing chairs at me and running aroung the neighborhood naked, asking for a lighter when she was drunk.......and there are worse memories than that.........as a result, everyone in my neighborhood except for two people hate me or have something against my whole family......I have hated my mom soooo much in the pats four years that I try to poison her while she's drunk and I beat her while she is drunk.......well, I will be dead by Christmas, most likely.