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NekoMika
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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-06-30 11:44:09 Reply

At 6/29/14 12:21 AM, Entice wrote:
At 6/28/14 11:52 PM, SCTE3 wrote: Best of luck, you don't truly need a therapist to get medications unless you're under 18.
That's good to know, though I appreciate having one either way

Fair enough, I just keep a diary because I tend to have a hard time opening up to people with personal issues. Might be moving out too in the next month or so.


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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-01 23:55:32 Reply

At 6/11/14 02:41 AM, The-Great-One wrote: I'm doing a bit of research for a book I am looking to write in the future and I wanted to know something about all of you here and that is this. What is your coming out story? How did you friends take it? How did your family take it? Why did you hide it or not hide it? When and how did you come to this realization?

Haven't posted on Newgrounds for a while (reddit stole my soul) but figured I'd answer this. It's funny since my posts from just a year ago on this club are so significantly different from where I'm at now. I'm gonna do it out of order since it makes more sense to me. This is going to be kind of long winded.

When and how did you come to this realization?

I think I was always aware I was missing something which other people around me were experiencing but I didn't specifically notice I was attracted to guys until I was 14. There was some school event at my high school which was pyjama day or some shit. The volleyball team being classic sport douches all showed up wearing only boxers. There were some very attractive guys on the volleyball team, as I later noted in the shower that night. It opened up this whole world of confusing thoughts and whenever I fapped after that it was to the thought of guys. I had a very long denial period (I'll come back to that) and started watching gay porn at 18. At this time I was at Uni, still going out with girls and telling myself I was Bi but only practically interested in girls.

Why did you hide it or not hide it?

I had a lot of self esteem issues in high school. I was a late bloomer in every sense of the word and it took me pretty much the entirety of high school before I reached any sense of self esteem again. Couple that with my very few friends becoming druggies and ditching me because I wasn't really into that and I had very few people I felt I could open up to. Once uni hit I was just struggling to get myself established and taken seriously. Looking back it would have been perfect to come out at that time but I wasn't ready. Few people guess I'm gay since I'm into more traditional male interests like rock climbing, backpacking, working out, drinking beer... in all my 18 year old immaturity I thought being gay meant I had to be catty, into shopping and obsessed with my self image. I got into a crowd of people with similar interests and was always worried that they would shun me or not want to be friends with me because of it, or later because I had lied to them. I went so far as to date girls, hook up with girls and in one case sleep with a girl in an attempt to hide it, but you can't hide those things from yourself. The first opportunity that came my way, I had a drunk hookup with a dude. It was awful and I felt awful and had no one to vent to. This spurred me to come out. I finally got to the point where I had the confidence that I'd rather live my life as me rather then be surrounded by people who don't actually know me.

How did you friends take it?

All of them took it well bar one. Everyone was surprised but all were extremely happy for me. I think a lot of people were aware how unhappy I had been with my dating (although most didn't realize it had to do with the gender of people I was with) and everyone was in my corner. Except for one guy who I was great friends with at Uni. He came from a family with very traditional views, we went drinking and rock climbing a lot together. He didn't handle it well that I violated his views of how gays are. He's slowly coming around but I think I really blew up how he views the world, which is a good thing I guess.

How did your family take it?

I came out to them recently. They were shocked and said a few negative things in the moment but have really come around. I love them.

NekoMika
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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-02 11:52:21 Reply

Single again, so hard to find ladies that are ok with you transitioning and being a m2f.


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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-02 19:26:58 Reply

At 7/2/14 11:52 AM, SCTE3 wrote: Single again, so hard to find ladies that are ok with you transitioning and being a m2f.

Aww, that sucks. What was she like?

Maybe you could try online dating? Apparently the majority of LGBT people find their significant others online. I need to try that.


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The-Great-One
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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-02 20:42:15 Reply

At 7/2/14 07:26 PM, SG3 wrote: Maybe you could try online dating? Apparently the majority of LGBT people find their significant others online. I need to try that.

I've thought about online dating myself. Seems like really the only option without being awkward.

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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-02 21:24:47 Reply

At 7/2/14 08:42 PM, The-Great-One wrote:
At 7/2/14 07:26 PM, SG3 wrote: Maybe you could try online dating? Apparently the majority of LGBT people find their significant others online. I need to try that.
I've thought about online dating myself. Seems like really the only option without being awkward.

They were ok, it was an online relationship so...

May try OKCupid, who knows.


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The-Great-One
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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-02 21:33:05 Reply

At 7/2/14 09:24 PM, SCTE3 wrote: May try OKCupid, who knows.

Off topic a bit, I don't like how the face in your icon just shifted. It doesn't seem like it's happy to see me, but instead is watching me masturbate. That makes me feel uncomfortable.

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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-03 02:45:05 Reply

At 7/2/14 09:33 PM, The-Great-One wrote:
At 7/2/14 09:24 PM, SCTE3 wrote: May try OKCupid, who knows.
Off topic a bit, I don't like how the face in your icon just shifted. It doesn't seem like it's happy to see me, but instead is watching me masturbate. That makes me feel uncomfortable.

I want a skitty icon.


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Confucianism
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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-04 03:35:04 Reply

I remember a time, when there wasn't a time to remember. And a place, where all places were the same... The middle ages I think...


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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-07 13:04:44 Reply

At 7/4/14 03:35 AM, Confucianism wrote: I remember a time, when there wasn't a time to remember. And a place, where all places were the same... The middle ages I think...

Thank you for that esoteric contribution, Confucianism.


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NekoMika
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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-08 10:55:46 Reply

Seems I don't start hormones this month, hopefully by second visit I'll be approved.


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The-Great-One
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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-08 18:24:45 Reply

At 7/8/14 11:36 AM, Agent-Venom wrote: I have reached the age where I'm supposed to be confident about my sexuality, but I'm still not sure about it.
Sigh.

What age is that? I reached the age of 12 when I started to think about it more and I became confident about it at 14.

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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-08 21:08:46 Reply

I thought about it most of last night and finally went out and bought some women's clothes and makeup

Funny thing I noticed: men didn't even act like they noticed at all, but a woman at the pharmacy and both of the cashiers that checked me out seemed weirded out. Not funny as in humorous but it's the opposite of what I expected

The stuff I got is pretty shitty and I have no idea what to do with it, but it feels good to at least do something I guess. And I know my pants size now

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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-09 07:22:40 Reply

At 7/9/14 05:16 AM, Agent-Venom wrote:
At 7/8/14 06:24 PM, The-Great-One wrote:
At 7/8/14 11:36 AM, Agent-Venom wrote: I have reached the age where I'm supposed to be confident about my sexuality, but I'm still not sure about it.
Sigh.
What age is that? I reached the age of 12 when I started to think about it more and I became confident about it at 14.
In my opinion, when you're 16 or older.

There are people much older than you who haven't even given any thought to their sexuality, assuming it to be "normal" (heterosexual). The fact that you're taking it into consideration shows something. Don't be upset because you don't have it all figured out at 16, it's a very complex subject.

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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-09 15:10:22 Reply

At 7/8/14 09:08 PM, Entice wrote: The stuff I got is pretty shitty and I have no idea what to do with it, but it feels good to at least do something I guess. And I know my pants size now

You know of any trans meet-up? If so they might be of help.


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NekoMika
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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-09 15:58:01 Reply

At 7/8/14 09:08 PM, Entice wrote: The stuff I got is pretty shitty and I have no idea what to do with it, but it feels good to at least do something I guess. And I know my pants size now

I have yet to do clothes shopping but I need to, fun stuff.


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WiiFittoToreinaa
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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-09 16:10:23 Reply

At 7/9/14 03:58 PM, SCTE3 wrote:
At 7/8/14 09:08 PM, Entice wrote: The stuff I got is pretty shitty and I have no idea what to do with it, but it feels good to at least do something I guess. And I know my pants size now
I have yet to do clothes shopping but I need to, fun stuff.

You also too need a shopping at the mall montage.


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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-09 16:27:54 Reply

At 7/9/14 03:10 PM, WiiFittoToreinaa wrote:
At 7/8/14 09:08 PM, Entice wrote: The stuff I got is pretty shitty and I have no idea what to do with it, but it feels good to at least do something I guess. And I know my pants size now
You know of any trans meet-up? If so they might be of help.

There's one in my city, but I haven't gone yet. Need to work on shyness I guess.

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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-09 16:38:54 Reply

At 7/9/14 04:27 PM, Entice wrote: There's one in my city, but I haven't gone yet. Need to work on shyness I guess.

Shyness can be cute, just keep it up.


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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-09 19:46:20 Reply

At 7/9/14 04:38 PM, WiiFittoToreinaa wrote:
At 7/9/14 04:27 PM, Entice wrote: There's one in my city, but I haven't gone yet. Need to work on shyness I guess.
Shyness can be cute, just keep it up.

Feels like it just gets me ignored a lot of the time honestly

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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-09 20:04:19 Reply

Turns out I work during the time they meet anyways

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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-10 08:53:42 Reply

At 7/9/14 08:04 PM, Entice wrote: Turns out I work during the time they meet anyways

Skip work?


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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-10 09:57:23 Reply

At 7/10/14 08:53 AM, SG3 wrote:
At 7/9/14 08:04 PM, Entice wrote: Turns out I work during the time they meet anyways
Skip work?

Well I'd rather not risk losing my job and I'll have that much more money to put towards my transition if I work a day

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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-10 11:48:14 Reply

At 7/7/14 01:04 PM, SG3 wrote: Thank you for that esoteric contribution, Confucianism.

Yush.


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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-12 18:21:55 Reply

SO after coming out to my father a few days ago, the only question he has what if I decide to have kids. I keep telling him I don't like being around kids and he doesn't seem to get it.


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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-12 22:38:18 Reply

At 7/12/14 06:21 PM, SCTE3 wrote: SO after coming out to my father a few days ago, the only question he has what if I decide to have kids. I keep telling him I don't like being around kids and he doesn't seem to get it.

It's the prospect of grandchildren and carrying on the family lineage. Remember that there is always adoption.

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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-13 04:16:55 Reply

At 7/12/14 10:38 PM, The-Great-One wrote: Remember that there is always adoption.

Adoption doesn't carry on the family DNA.

At least donate sperm or something.

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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-13 18:18:06 Reply

At 7/13/14 04:16 AM, Painbringer wrote:
At 7/12/14 10:38 PM, The-Great-One wrote: Remember that there is always adoption.
Adoption doesn't carry on the family DNA.

At least donate sperm or something.

I highly doubt she's the last to carry on her family's bloodline. She probably has cousins and other relatives who'll have children so they're not losing anything. Seriously, who came up with the idea that it's your parent's decision whether you have kids or not. You're not obligated to do anything you don't want to.

@STCE3 how did it go besides that? Your family are super conservative, right? Did it go down okay?


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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-13 19:46:58 Reply

At 7/13/14 06:18 PM, SG3 wrote: Seriously, who came up with the idea that it's your parent's decision whether you have kids or not. You're not obligated to do anything you don't want to.

It is not the parents decision. I was just saying that I can understand where the parent is coming from.

@STCE3 how did it go besides that? Your family are super conservative, right? Did it go down okay?

I am quite curious about this as well.

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Response to Newgrounds Gay/bisexual Users Club 2014-07-13 23:32:48 Reply

At 7/13/14 06:18 PM, SG3 wrote: @STCE3 how did it go besides that?

He just kind of looked at me. I have siblings but I never mention them since they anger and upset me for various reasons I don't feel like mentioning, so no it's not going to hurt if I don't have kids. I'd prefer to just be with my lover and not be bothered by children.

Your family are super conservative, right?

Yes

Did it go down okay?

Yea, we just went back to watching the movie I had put in the DVD player for his TV.


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