I can't fucking stand little kids. 2007-06-09 20:07:13
I just can't stand being around them anymore. Now, don't get me wrong. I like kids. I hope I can be a father one day. But, to be bothered by one is like a taste of Hell gone bad. I've had a few encounters with them, and I'll tell you about a few.
1. I was a Papa Gino's a few weeks ago. They had an arcade machine, a Simpson's bowling one. While waiting for the people to make my respectable cheese pizza, I go to examine the brightly colored machine. Not play it. Then the little one comes. A boy, about 3 years, quickly runs up to me and pushes me. I stumbled back because of surprise, not because of the push. I swear. "THISA MINE!" he shouted at the top of his lungs. I'm bewildered, because this all happened in les than 7 seconds. I realized that what he had said was, "This is mine!". "Uh.." I replied. Here comes the part where I started to hate him. The little guy purposely falls and starts to cry. At that exact moment, my pizza was ready, so I grabbed it and paid for it. When I turned around, the little boy had gotten his father and the manager. "Uh.." I said again. I was forced to leave. I had gotten my pizza, at least. But I couldn't retrieve my fucking Dr. Pepper.
2. My next story happens to take place at a restraunt as well. A Macaroni Grill. I was there for Mother's day. After I had ordered, a little chubby girl, about 5, ran up behind me and squeezed my next from behind the booth and started to squeeze my neck as hard as she could. "YOU'RE MY BOYYYYYFRIEND!" she squeeled. In reaction to my lack of precious oxygen, I pushed her away. She started to cry even louder than the boy at Papa Gino's. Now, everyone in the restraunt is staring at me with that. "You son of a fucking asshole." look. She ruined my poor mother's evening.
I'll add more of my times should I find some more. I hope I don't.