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Why do people EVEN get married?

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Detesticus
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Here's another concept to fathom. Why do people get married? Do women get married in fear that their biological Clocks will terminate? Do men marry in fear of growing old and dying alone? Or why do people get married in the first place anymore? Well let me tell ya, the "We are in lOVE with each other" answer usually isn't the case.

I bring this up because of the marriage and divorce rates in America. Do you ever wonder WHY it is SO EASY to get married but it is so HARD to get DIVORCED? Divorces take half of what you own, and usually the woman gets Child Custody!

And what constitutes so many divorces? Maybe the standard way of finding your mate. In dark and dank Bars where everyone is just as general as everyone else.

And what I don't get is...MARRIAGE is really a big step. I mean instead of getting married. Why odn't people just decide to swear their SOULS to each other or something and move in with one another! THat way, if it gets boring or bad, you have no obligation to stay, and you can just leave, free of any legal red-tape.

That was my question on the whole topic.

REALFormidableFoe
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-25 22:25:10 Reply

I didn't read anything except the subject. But, people get married for 3 reasons.

1. They get drunk and do it non-knowingly.
2. Accidental pregnancy leading to marriage.
3. ACTUAL love.(hard to believe, huh?)

olskoo
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-25 23:09:22 Reply

At 12/25/02 10:22 PM, Detesticus wrote: Do you ever wonder WHY it is SO EASY to get married but it is so HARD to get DIVORCED?

because to get married all you need is a license and a priest. To get divorced you need a lawyer.

Bungled
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-25 23:13:01 Reply

2 people actually loving one another is a good reason. true you can carry on the same relationship with a person even if you aren't married to him/her. but marriage is a loving promise to commit, for the rest of their lives...it's just a nice thing to do, i know that i plan to do it:)

~Shar

AJL-1984
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-25 23:21:08 Reply

I'd probably do it if i could find a woman who was even remotely interested in me.

JudgeDredd
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-25 23:21:47 Reply

only 1 answer really.... PIMP IT!!!

Detesticus
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-25 23:23:40 Reply

At 12/25/02 11:13 PM, bungled_girl wrote: 2 people actually loving one another is a good reason. true you can carry on the same relationship with a person even if you aren't married to him/her. but marriage is a loving promise to commit, for the rest of their lives...it's just a nice thing to do, i know that i plan to do it:)

~Shar

Well, I guess. But it tends to be that divorce is quite rampant. Maybe people marry someone they don't know really. Usually divorces are about...you guesses it...one of the roots of evil...MONEY and GREED!

Still here's a way to know that your lover may be the ONE. Plan a trip where you will be on the road and have INTENTIONAL circumstances that are irritating. (I.E. cramped car, Extreme Heat or Cold, No Food...) Your mate's real side will probably show thru then. If you can put up with them at their WORST and still have no doubts about your love for them, then maybe yeah...

DUDE4U
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-25 23:28:32 Reply

At 12/25/02 11:13 PM, bungled_girl wrote: 2 people actually loving one another is a good reason. true you can carry on the same relationship with a person even if you aren't married to him/her. but marriage is a loving promise to commit, for the rest of their lives...it's just a nice thing to do, i know that i plan to do it:)

~Shar

yea i wuz about to say that when people get married its a commitment of some kind to stay together and cherish each other in good times and in bad. Also it shows that u really love a person to be with them unless ur an immigrant and married them to keep ur ass in the country ^_^

Radam
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-25 23:35:57 Reply

At 12/25/02 11:09 PM, olskoo wrote:
At 12/25/02 10:22 PM, Detesticus wrote: Do you ever wonder WHY it is SO EASY to get married but it is so HARD to get DIVORCED?
because to get married all you need is a license and a priest. To get divorced you need a lawyer.

I'm an ordained minister.


>:C

JudgeDredd
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-25 23:39:16 Reply

At 12/25/02 11:23 PM, Detesticus wrote:
At 12/25/02 11:13 PM, bungled_girl wrote: 2 people actually loving one another is a good reason ... i know that i plan to do it:)

~Shar
Maybe people marry someone they don't know really. Usually divorces are about...you guesses it...one of the roots of evil...MONEY and GREED!

NOT AT ALL.

MARRIAGE IS A NEED FOR SOME-1.
DIVORCE IS A NEED FOR SOME-1-ELSE.

(i'm speaking fro 10 years of experience ;O)_*

GrandmasterJ
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 01:10:09 Reply

At 12/25/02 10:22 PM, Detesticus wrote: Why odn't people just decide to swear their SOULS to each other or something and move in with one another!

Because that makes them prime targets for elaborate murders involving a jealous ex or a love-starved axe-murderer or the bad boys who practically OWN the 'hood. Don't you ever pay attention to movies?

cylon
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 01:16:58 Reply

I think people want to get married because they want to spend their life with someone, start a family with them, be with them. You can do this without being married, but that's not so symbolically "secure", you know? Like with marriage, theoretically at least, you're to be with that person for the rest of your life because you want to be with them for the rest of your life.

Unfortunately sometimes people change for the worse, or they pick people who are wrong for them, they are too hasty, they marry for the wrong reasons (money, prestige, 15-minutes-of-fame, to please others) or a multitude of other reasons that lead to short marriages.

Apherial
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 01:23:47 Reply

Marriage doesn't seem too bad... then again, I really have no room to talk considering I'm only 14, but I don't care. My girlfriend and I always talk about it... jokingly, of course, but hey, it makes for interesting conversation. My Uncle Brian just got married, and Kenzie and I talked to him about it. He seems pretty happy... if me and Kenzie stay together long enough, I think Brian talked us into it. Meh... maybe it's just a pipe dream of mine though... but I'm not on anything! Meh... I'll shut up now. :(

UndergroundDecay
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 01:27:35 Reply

to get divorced

mattymetro
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 01:28:15 Reply

I dont think that I would ever consider marriage...
Not in this day and age.. and not being the realistic person that I have become...

NemoX
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 01:45:19 Reply

'cause we as humans can't stand to be alone, and those who say they can, are not being true to themselves.
or maybe it's just 'cause we are stupid and do things without thinking.

j3nnica
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 01:55:04 Reply

Because they are naive, my parents are getting divorced soon after 25 years of marriage. Even though im grown I wish they gotten divorced sooner.

My Dad is a control freak and I blame him for ruining my potential life. THats my thought on marriage. Happy Holidays!

JacksRage
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 02:01:28 Reply

So the bitch can't testify against you. ^^


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agent66
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 05:23:30 Reply

Eventually most people can't resist the urge to have kids. It's not such a big deal these days I guess but when I was a kid there was a lot of shame associated with being born out of wedlock. I think many do it to avoid this shame for themselves and their children.

fireballer
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 05:43:34 Reply

I agree with that. There is another factor that plays in sometimes. If you come from a really religious family and you go out and get knocked up or knock somebody up, you better get ready to kiss that freedom goodbye. Religious parents will force their kids to marry in order to give the baby a name. That has happened to a couple of my friends.

Shrapnel
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 05:54:06 Reply

At 12/26/02 01:55 AM, Vj20 wrote: Because they are naive, my parents are getting divorced soon after 25 years of marriage. Even though im grown I wish they gotten divorced sooner.

poor Vj20 :(

Try to keep your chin up kid!

fireballer
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 06:05:37 Reply

For some people its all about kids. I am 24 married with two kids. I wouldn't trade my girls for anything. There are times when I wonder why the hell I got married, but I realize that deep down I love my wife. I just don't like her sometimes.

JudgeDredd
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 06:20:58 Reply

At 12/26/02 01:28 AM, mattymetro wrote: I dont think that I would ever consider marriage...
Not in this day and age.. and not being the realistic person that I have become...

what are modern relationships?

Although i've been married 1 whole decade, my 9 y/o daughter has hardly ever seen me because we have remained seperated (not actually divorced) almost throughout. Conversely i have a sister who has been "living defacto" for just as long, and with the same partner, and they have couple of kids who have never been without solid loving parents.

but "shacking up" is really the kicker!

Although i'm living on an island as far from complex life as one can possibly get, we have new defacto laws which state; "a defacto relationship of three years is considered marriage by legislation". This legislation was inacted retrospectively on all couples already in a defacto relationship beginning 1 February 2002.

So if you've been "shacked up" for just three years but decide to separate, then the same rules will apply to defacto and same sex couples as if they were married (although gays can't yet marry legally) ..and as such all property will be divided half each.

Say you are in a defacto relationship that commenced on 1 August 1999 and you only just separated on 1 September 2002. Then although the new law is only 10 months old, when it comes to dividing ALL your properties, such couples will be deemed to have been living together for a period of three years and thus be legally subject to equal sharing of EVERYTHING!!!

The big question under the new law is: "What does living in a defacto relationship mean?" The Act says it means "living as a couple" which sets out criteria for the Court to consider when deciding whether or not people have been living in a defacto relationship - or not.

But essentially, you could be some otherwise unaware hill-billy farmer who's family has owned the same plot of land for MANY generations, but still be forced by the courts to sell "at current market value" ALL such properties in order to "pay off" your 3 year "live-in neighbour"

Mwaaahahaahaaa!!!!

Can ANYONE TOP THAT?? ;O)_*

aherdofgoats
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 06:22:52 Reply

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Sarafan
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 06:27:42 Reply

its harder to break up then, gives women HUGE amount of rights and men a little ...

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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 07:28:46 Reply

They were raised to do so by family, friends, and society. If they don't get married someone fucked up somewhere along the assembly line.

Detesticus
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 11:10:01 Reply

At 12/26/02 05:23 AM, agent66 wrote: Eventually most people can't resist the urge to have kids. It's not such a big deal these days I guess but when I was a kid there was a lot of shame associated with being born out of wedlock. I think many do it to avoid this shame for themselves and their children.

Ture, but I think this "shame" is really undermined as of today. I mean there arep lenty of single motehrs and fathers aout there. Having a baby out of "wedlock" doesn't diminish a person...in my own opinion at least. Besides, society is more diverse and accepting it seems..

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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 11:16:15 Reply

Frankly, I'm totally jaded against the idea of marriage. It's just not for me.

I'd be more likely to have a girlfriend for life, just so we could take time outs away from each other cause often times, you need your own space no matter what you think. Also, this can somehow make the sex seem better in a way, as long as you both are still using protection.

ageekatheart
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 11:18:27 Reply

some people think that it's the only way their relationship.

some people get married because they think no one else will want them.

some wil get married out of necessity.

most of the girls i know want to get married as soon as they can and have millions of kids. why? who the fuck knows...

but some people, the lucky few... get married because their significant other means the world to them...

i'd like to eventually get married and it be because of my fifth reason.

ageekatheart
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Response to Why do people EVEN get married? 2002-12-26 11:19:44 Reply

(my first reason should have said that some people get married because they think it's the only way their relationship will go to the next level. sorry about that, i'm not thinking.)