At 2/5/09 10:57 AM, Strongbow wrote:
Okay, serious question.
There's this girl. I really REALLY like her, to a point where I look forward to the next time I see her. BUt the thing is, I don't know anything about her.
I thought this was serious? How can you really REALLY like her when you know nothing about her? She's a girl, she might look good, she might have a nice smile, but that is in no way a reason to like a girl that much.
The reason for saying this, is because if you act like this about a girl at this stage, you'll probably screw up once you get a chance with her due to treating her differently. Back off a bit and wait with liking her untill you know something about her to like. Appreciating her for something she's got nothing to do with (a personality you don't know, her physical appearance except for clothes etc.), is something that'll make her severaly less interested in you.
How can I get to know her without her friends interfering?
By becoming friends with her friends and showing them you're not a threat to her. Yeah, doesn't sound that easy now does it? It shouldn't, because it isn't. In fact, it's one of the hardest things to do when her friends are against you.
I think the best thing to do is move on. The reason why is because it's very hard to learn all the skills needed to pull something like this off. You'll need to be very witty, be able to have an answer to everything, be confident and many more.
However, if you're not willing to move on just like that, you can also try something different. Be direct.
Confront her friends on giving you shit, ask them why they do it, etc. The sucky side of doing this is that you can hardly predict what will happen, so there's a chance they'll back off and you can talk to the girl, or that the entire group will think of you as an asshole, including your girl of interest.
At 2/5/09 03:27 PM, knugen wrote:
So anyway, any tips on what I should do now? This feels like a deadlock :/
Hey, did you hear that?
"Move on, don't let this shit tire you emotionally and find a girl that's actually interested"
I heard it again! What is that?
Seriously though, move on. There's either something with this girl preventing her from finding you interesting enough (could be her, most likely you though), or you simply can't fix this situation anymore.
Wait, that's actually not true. Moving on is the only and also perfect way to fix this. If you shut off any interest for her whatsoever, except for being friends, she'll notice the change. And if she's even remotely interested in you right now, she'll start to wonder what's happened. Keep this up untill she comes back to you and don't make any moves yourself, EVER!
Also, this is a win-win situation:
- You move on, she develops interest, you get another shot.
- You move on, meet someone else, you get another shot.
Beats boring conversations and emotional weariness, doesn't it?
At 2/5/09 05:37 PM, evan210 wrote:
i just don't get it... does she hate me or something, or is that just some strange(and cruel) way of saying she likes me???
She likes you. Most signals girls send out are subtle, often too subtle for your average chump to notice. That's why a lot of girls get frustrated with sending out signals, others intensify them to make them more obvious.
In your case, the eye contact is an abvious signal, as well as bumping into you.
Now, I have never seen this girl, I know less about you then her, but judging from her behaviour (not talking to you but bumping into you repeatedly), I'd say she's not the most stable girl to go with.
Of course, I have no idea wether you're interested in her or not, but if you do, I'd watch out. She might be totally cool, but she could also turn into a creepy stalker or extremely jealous girlfriend.
Trust me, I've been there...
At 2/5/09 06:55 PM, UltimateAxl wrote:
I got some results in. She says, "I don't think for right now we should start, but can we still be friends and still hangout?" I said, "sure, it's no problem. It's better being friends than not."
Casually hanging out, having fun, is actually the best way to get with a girl. Remember to tease her though, because without it, you'll become just another one of her girlfriends. You don't want to be a girlfriend now do you? :P
About the hangout situation, I'm not going to rush it. Maybe in a couple of weeks, or maybe just a month, I'll ask her if she wants to hangout on the weekends, that way, maybe I'll get her number. I think I'm all set out now, thanks to you Vincoid. I've grown out of my shell of shyness and acting to weak.
That's why I'm here man. And if you've got any other issues you need help with, be it specific situations or something about your personality you don't feel confident about etc, just ask.