At 6/27/13 07:19 PM, Demonbrunch wrote: I wish I had the brains and muscles of the most powerful superhero.

Granted. You wake up the next morning not feeling much different. You discover you have a package waiting at your doorstep...a human brain and a soggy cardboard box filled with meat and blood. You have the brain and muscles of the most powerful superhero.

I wish I died fifty years from now in the most glorious, manliest way possible.

At 6/27/13 07:21 PM, Phobotech wrote:

I wish I died fifty years from now in the most glorious, manliest way possible.

ALready did that. bear who ate your soul leads the bear rebellion. But I forgot to make my own wish. correcting!

I wish for soap that doesn't get dented while I drop in it non-prison conditions that don't lend themselves to the easy joke.

At 6/27/13 07:24 PM, stafffighter wrote:
I wish for soap that doesn't get dented while I drop in it non-prison conditions that don't lend themselves to the easy joke.

Granted, you have a bar of super soap. However, it is curry scented.

I wish my motorcycle had new, state-of-the-art brakes.

At 6/27/13 06:47 PM, Phobotech wrote:

At 6/27/13 06:12 PM, kakalxlax wrote:
i wish to eat a coconut in perfect edible state without any contamination knowing im not allergic and that i cant choke on it

Granted, but its stale. It was a very unimpressive and forgettable experience.

"perfect edible state"

The "and" indicates a seperate wish, though...you almost choke on it.

the and is part of the description of the coconut not the wish

At 6/27/13 08:14 PM, Phobotech wrote:

At 6/27/13 07:24 PM, stafffighter wrote:
I wish for soap that doesn't get dented while I drop in it non-prison conditions that don't lend themselves to the easy joke.

Granted, you have a bar of super soap. However, it is curry scented.

I wish my motorcycle had new, state-of-the-art brakes.

Granted, but it won't accelerate any more.

I wish I could finally get up to clean my aquarium.

At 6/29/13 10:13 AM, VinnyXY wrote: I wish to know something.

You know that Mother Teresa is the most loved person in modern times, but she got help from dictators.

I wish cats could talk.

At 6/29/13 10:16 AM, Ericho wrote:

At 6/29/13 10:13 AM, VinnyXY wrote: I wish to know something.

You know that Mother Teresa is the most loved person in modern times, but she got help from dictators.

I wish cats could talk.

Granted, but they only insult you all the time.

I wish to know the meaning of life.

At 6/29/13 12:17 PM, SuperHitlerReborn wrote:
I wish for more people to read my book.

Granted, but they don't necessarily like it.

Or pay money for it, on that matter.

I wish I could control the clouds to do my bidding, effortlessly, whenever I wanted.

At 6/29/13 12:49 PM, Phobotech wrote: I wish I could control the clouds to do my bidding, effortlessly, whenever I wanted.

Granted, now people blame you for the bad weather.

I wish they take me at university.

At 6/29/13 01:18 PM, infamoss wrote:

At 6/29/13 12:59 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote:

I wish they take me at university.

Granted, and you become like everyone else.

I wish to die.

Granted, but you'll go to hell.

I wish I was in hell.

At 6/29/13 01:18 PM, infamoss wrote:

I wish to die.

Granted, peacefully in your sleep at an obscenely old age where pop culture left you feeling alienated and alone decades ago.

I wish for Godzilla to do a guitar solo.

At 6/29/13 01:21 PM, stafffighter wrote: I wish for Godzilla to do a guitar solo.

Granted but it makes heavy metal and has to be shot.

I wish for a heavy metal dinosaur.

At 6/29/13 06:25 PM, ragnkinson wrote:

I wish for a heavy metal dinosaur.

Granted. Now nothing you see for the rest of your life will be as cool as this picture

I wish for a safe, easy to pilot, economical jetpack.

At 6/29/13 06:34 PM, stafffighter wrote: I wish for a safe, easy to pilot, economical jetpack.

Granted; while flying comfortably through the skies someone shoots the gas tank. You did not survive.

I wish for the same thing, but to add the jetpack is invulnerable.

At 6/29/13 06:34 PM, stafffighter wrote:

At 6/29/13 06:25 PM, ragnkinson wrote:

I wish for a heavy metal dinosaur.

Granted. Now nothing you see for the rest of your life will be as cool as this picture

I wish for a safe, easy to pilot, economical jetpack.

Granted, but you decided it was a good idea to fly the jetpack during a thunder storm. You are then hit by baseball size hail 20,000ft above ground and knocked unconscious. You wake up mere seconds before you hit the ground, but there is nothing you can do, so you die while screaming. On the upside, the jetpack is still ok because you broke its fall.

At 6/29/13 12:59 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote:

I wish I was in hell.

Granted, you are now stuck on earth forever and can't leave Newgrounds BBS.

I wish my wish could be skipped.

At 6/29/13 06:39 PM, Tankdown wrote:

At 6/29/13 06:34 PM, stafffighter wrote: I wish for a safe, easy to pilot, economical jetpack.

Granted; while flying comfortably through the skies someone shoots the gas tank. You did not survive.

I wish for the same thing, but to add the jetpack is invulnerable.

Granted, but you decided it was a good idea to fly the jetpack during a thunder storm. You are then hit by baseball size hail 20,000ft above ground and knocked unconscious. You wake up mere seconds before you hit the ground, but there is nothing you can do, so you die while screaming. On the upside, the jetpack is still ok because you broke its fall. ( ya copy and past....)

I wish my wish could be skipped.

At 6/29/13 06:49 PM, 00Nick00 wrote:
I wish my w-sh c-could be skipped.

Granted, the CD skipped on your post and its skipping because you need to take better care of your post discs.

I wish we collectively recognize Nikola Tesla for his brilliance instead of Thomas Edison.

At 6/29/13 08:47 PM, Phobotech wrote: I wish we collectively recognize Nikola Tesla for his brilliance instead of Thomas Edison.

Granted but there will be lots of Teslacoils around the world.

I wish for a pot of gold.

Granted. You die. the end.

I wish this wish is uncorruptable.

At 6/30/13 06:19 AM, Pixelwiz wrote: Granted. You die. the end.

I wish this wish is uncorruptable.

Fuck you.

At 6/30/13 05:48 AM, ragnkinson wrote:
I wish for a pot of gold.

Granted, but its the tiniest pot ever.

I wish I owned a 10 foot tall pilotable mech suit that ran on gasoline that could last with its existing parts, functionally, for decades safely.

At 6/30/13 06:57 AM, Phobotech wrote: I wish I owned a 10 foot tall pilotable mech suit that ran on gasoline that could last with its existing parts, functionally, for decades safely.

It contains the soul of your dead mother (yeah, I had to make an Evangelion reference).

You wish you had perfect grades.

At 6/30/13 09:51 AM, Ericho wrote:

At 6/30/13 06:57 AM, Phobotech wrote: I wish I owned a 10 foot tall pilotable mech suit that ran on gasoline that could last with its existing parts, functionally, for decades safely.

It contains the soul of your dead mother (yeah, I had to make an Evangelion reference).

You wish you had perfect grades.

A) My Mom's not dead
B) It ran on gasoline, not embedded into the biology of an angel
C) Of which, an EVA unit is more like twenty-forty stories tall, and I just wanted something comparable to a semi-truck
D) "I wish I had perfect grades?"

...I do?

Okay erm...I uh, Granted...but they are grades in a skill that I can't possibly get a job or make money with...

I um. I wish I had the ability to manipulate all carbon, regardless of range, scale/size, or consistency.

At 6/30/13 09:58 AM, Phobotech wrote: I um. I wish I had the ability to manipulate all carbon, regardless of range, scale/size, or consistency.

Granted, but you are beaten to death with an iron pipe, and you can't manipulate that.

I wish to be the one who beats you to death.

At 6/30/13 10:11 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote:

At 6/30/13 09:58 AM, Phobotech wrote: I um. I wish I had the ability to manipulate all carbon, regardless of range, scale/size, or consistency.

Granted, but you are beaten to death with an iron pipe, and you can't manipulate that.

lmfao, nice

I wish to be the one who beats you to death.

Granted and you go to jail or something, obligatory anal rape comment.

I wish I owned my very own, functioning, life-size Kaneda Motorcycle from Akira.

At 6/30/13 10:17 AM, Phobotech wrote: I wish I owned my very own, functioning, life-size Kaneda Motorcycle from Akira.

Granted, but you don't have the slightest idea how to drive it.

I wish I could drive a motorcycle.

At 6/30/13 10:22 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote:
I wish I could drive a motorcycle.

Granted, you learn how to drive a motorcycle. However, all you have left to flex this newfound experience on is with a Vespa.

I wish I could Motorcross.

At 6/30/13 10:30 AM, Phobotech wrote:

At 6/30/13 10:22 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote:
I wish I could drive a motorcycle.

Granted, you learn how to drive a motorcycle. However, all you have left to flex this newfound experience on is with a Vespa.

I wish I could Motorcross.

Granted, but you die in a car accident. Oh the irony.

I wish I knew what to wish for.

At 6/30/13 10:38 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote:
I wish I knew what to wish for.

Granted, but it comes too late...the wish isn't even corrupted or anything, you waited too long.

err....yeah

I wish I could sleep or wake up precisely when I mean to.

At 6/30/13 10:42 AM, Phobotech wrote:
I wish I could sleep or wake up precisely when I mean to.

Granted but you have no idea what time you wake up.

I wish for bigger muscles.

At 6/30/13 11:00 AM, ragnkinson wrote:

At 6/30/13 10:42 AM, Phobotech wrote:
I wish I could sleep or wake up precisely when I mean to.

Granted but you have no idea what time you wake up.

I wish for bigger muscles.

Granted, you die of steroid abuse.

I wish I stopped killing people in my corruptions.