I consider the Comic Jam a success, even though there were "only" 9 submissions, I think the quality really makes up for that. And 9 is not bad for a first comic jam actually. As for the commenting, I will TRY to keep it short.
Kuoke - Red Light, Black Light
Really dark themed comic, with that "Sin City" feel, that has already been mentioned.
As much as I like the style, sometimes it is hard to realize what's going on in the panels. A thing that really interupts the reader, which is not helping the comic.
But the art is definitely catching and suits the comic well. Nice work on the close-ups too.
The story is not the most original thing, but it's nicely done and well delivered.
I like how you did the speech bubbles, making the text stick out of them here and there.
Nice choice with white letters in black speech bubbles, supports the style and is easy to read.
Overall the art and style are the strongest part of this comic. If you team up with a talented writer, you could blow us away. Not saying your writing was bad though.
Aigis - Waking Dreams
You really set the bar for this comic jam and you did not set it low.
What can I say about this comic, that is not obvious? It is well drawn, well written, funny and simply feels "complete".
Impressive how you drew everything with just black and white. It really looks like one of these short comics you could find in a newspaper.
Original story with a well delivered ending.
I especially like the different facial expressions.
Overall a great comic.
Knocturne - Vampire Song
I did not get that this was based on one of your band's songs until Aigis mentioned it, but once I read that, the origin as a song is recognizable.
Regarding the art, it is well done even though it is sketchy. I don't like way you darkened the panels especially on the first pages. Not because the darkening was a bad idea, but because it makes it kinda hard to see what was going on.
The protagonist was well done, the rest could have used some work, but I can understand that this is due to the time restraint.
I would lie if I said that I got it on the first read, I did in fact read it three times to realize what the story is about.
The story in this case, is the strongest part.
You should have teamed up with one more artist so you don't have to do so many pages all on your own. That way you could have spent more time polishing the comic.
I can see why you chose to use a font rather than handwriting after the first panel, but I neither like the font choice, nor the colour nor the layout.
Overall a good entry that benefits from the story and your songs lyrics. Art-wise it should have been polished a bit.
Fifty-50 - Codename: Athenos
Finish that dammit!!!!!!
I see that this is going into a somewhat often used story for anime comics, but really, this looks so awesome.
Did I already say that you should finish this? DO IT!
M-Vero (Characters) & Felis (Backgrounds and Story) - Art Whores in: Vigilantes, Eh?
Brilliant one! I think this is the most funny one.
Nice how you used some recognizable art forum "features".
The story is really original and the art is decent of course.
The twisted ending really added to the humour. Also the obligatory cock joke. Well done.
It's a bit weird that the style of the drawings change a little in different panels, but then again it adds to the humour.
The text is kinda hard to read sometimes. I appreciate that you tried to do it by hand, but a little more readability would be appreciated.
Overall a pretty funny comic, with great art, a random story, art whores and Big-Jonny-13. What more can you ask for? :P
Kinsei01 (and pals) - Children
Good story good art. I personally like this one a lot. Mainly because you managed to tell the story without any words.
But I also really like how you draw the forest.
The part with the boy next to his mom is nicely done in terms of bringing the story across, but the perspective is a bit overdone.
What I don't like is the vast amount of white. The panels are mostly white and there is too much white space around the panels sometimes.
If you had enough time, you should have added some shades to the drawings to have some more dark parts to it, but I take it, you didn't do it because of the time restraint.
The final panel is really great, that great actually that it deserves to be mentioned seperately.
Overall a great submission of course. You could have teamed up with someone to find the time to add some shading though. That would make it an even stronger piece.
Ramatsu - Amaterasu The Sun Goddess
Nice classic anime styled comic. I like how you managed to keep everything clean and tidy even though you worked with pencil.
The drawings are pretty nice. The text is good to read but the letters are still a bit inconsistent, I would advice using a suiting font instead.
You should also check your writing, there are capitalized words every here and there and some punctuation is missing. It disturbs the reading flow a little.
Generally the story is nothing incredibly original but it's still interesting.
As a reader, I would know how the story continues, that's a good sign. Maybe the main goal for every story teller.
The art itself is nicely done and the anime style goes well with the setting.
Overall a good entry that I would like to see inked someday if possible.
lovingthedark (Illustrations) & Wivernryder (Writing & Storyboards) - Herp Derp
Pretty funny one here. The art is just great, what more can I say about it?
The last panel should show a slightly larger view of the room, so the reader instantly gets what happened. I did not get it on my first read.
There is no real story that could be commented, but for the sake of giving a smile to the reader, that sacrifice is acceptable.
Overall a strong piece art wise and a very good piece idea wise.
bilalz - Detective Funsize
Funny cartoony submission. The style you used goes very well with a comic and you put in some nice jokes in there.
You should have watched your speech bubbles a bit more. Sometimes they are too big for the text and most times it's not centered, horizontally or vertically.
Once or twice the sentences do not start with a capitalized word like they should.
I don't know why the first page is blue and the rest is grey. It would have been nice if all pages had a different colour or if the pages happening in the office had a grey colour and everything happening in Chef Franz's kitchen was blue.
You could have used a different colour for every page too.
Overall a funny cartoony submission. You should work a little on the speech bubbles and maybe use a different font.
You can find some good resources for fonts here: http://art101.newgrounds.com/news/post/5 69368
Nice work to all people who submitted. I hope to see you in a possible second comic jam again.