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Sleeping in an Empty Room

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This is my entry for the 2020 NGUAC (Newgrounds Underdogs' Audio Contest) knockout round. I know how I usually mention how long a song takes me to get done, but for this one, I was only given 2 weeks, so now you get to hear what less than 2 weeks of work from only me on a track sounds like. Also, if this track has some big issues, especially technical ones, but people generally like it, I might continue working on it after the KO round is over.


All samples are mine, apart from the piano, which is a free sampled plugin called Keyzone Classic.


Updated version of this song here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qNtEtSdyBqE

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yo, love the initial vibe. i think dropping back the reverb a bit when the beat comes in to bring the piano closer would've been nice, give the beat a more intimate feeling. i like the piano changeup at the halfway point but really not digging the big stadium dubstep drums. appreciate the attempt at an emotional crescendo w/ the filters opening up and the open hihats coming out, but it doesn't really stick the landing. the phasey crunchy drums would be good sound for a top loop over the initial kick/snare but don't really have the gravitas to carry such a big change in the overall feel.

structurally it kinda just starts and then goes and then fizzles out. the change halfway is cool but there's no real breathing space at any point. drop out to that second piano part on it's own for a bit, cut the bass out here and there. idk. on one hand the track doesn't really have a whole lot going on but on the other hand it has this really abrasive drum switch in the midpoint which could be cool but isn't effectively capitalised on. and i think i would prefer a simple idea really well realised to an ambitious gamble that doesn't quite pay off.

i will also say though that i do like the highpass filtery transitions - just needs some other element to really sell the tension and release between sections. the reverb fade on the drums at the end was also really nice. also the flutey synth line in the first half is very nice and it should make a more prominent return.

tl;dr - make the second half more like the first half but keep the cool synthwavey leads and pads, and add more small details in the arrangement and structure. it's most of the way there! thanks for doin' the nguac :)

-Official NGUAC 2020 KO Round Review-

Interesting track, i like the piano sound you chose. In the first 23 seconds the pad could have been introduced more gradually in volume before the drum section starts at 0:24. About them, the kick and hi hats are spot on, but i found the snare strangely compressed, to the point where it feels drained out and off place. It may be not that big of a deal, but i ensure you it impacts a lot the first half of the track. The synth pad at 1:12 is good as well, even if it could have been juuust a little lower in bass frequences and volume. I liked the second half of the track better, especially at 1:36 when the drums come in. Putting distortion on them was a good choice, since it changed the pace for the better.
Overall, i enjoyed your track quite a bit, and i found the concept and melody both interesting and well-thought: just a little bit more tweaking here and there, and its potential would have grown even more. Good job!

Originality: 2/2
Composition: 2/2
Structure: 2/2
Tecnicity: 1/2
Impact: 1.5/2

Total: 8.5/10

BeeFef responds:

Thanks for the review. So, there wasn't actually a pad at the beginning. I think you were just hearing the reverb on the piano. The reverb starts right away, so maybe I could've just brought the mix of the reverb up over the intro. For the snare, do you mean compressed in terms of volume/dynamics or in quality? If it's the latter, then the sharp lowpass filter you hear is intentional. I processed it to give it that Skype call sound and make it sound digitally lo-fi. I understand that some people may not like it, but I think it's kinda cool when used in the right way(s). At 1:12, maybe a gain automation on the sub bass would be good. And yes, I will continue to work on this track, as I heard more issues with the mixing/mastering on this and still have yet to release this track other than on NG.

noice

BeeFef responds:

thank

Chill lo-fi kinda song!! Like it :)

BeeFef responds:

that was my intention. Thanks!

Spot on lo-fi sound

BeeFef responds:

thank you, my dude

Credits & Info

Artist

Listens
3,819
Faves:
7
Downloads
109
Votes
29
Score
4.39 / 5.00

Uploaded
Aug 24, 2020
11:09 PM EDT
Genre
Ambient
File Info
Song
7.5 MB
3 min 18 sec

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