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Collision Course

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In the not too distant future, John Kepler is on a solo space mission to discover the unknown and the truth behind dark matter. Initially part of a crew of five, the other four backed out upon finding out a return journey was not likely. John agreed as he has nothing left on earth. His wife and daughter are dead, and so for the benefit of humanity he goes forth. The target planet is Proxima B, theorized to be similar to Earth and this potentially habitable for us.

Four years into his journey he stumbles on a spaceship he's never seen before... what's about to happen next is anyone's guess...

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I like the atmosphere at the beginning. Has a bit of an ominous mood. The pads in the background have a bit of a harsh edge - couldn’t hurt to take off a little treble in the equalizer. I like the bass and kick that come in at 1:05 - they add a lot of tension and drive to the piece. It’s very slow to progress, but has a good sense of climax over time. I think that bass is overwhelming the kick a little - I might suggest some sidechaining, or simply stricter equalizing and compression. After the bass and kick cut out at 2:09, the piece loses its sense of direction a bit. I think you need more melodic content - or even simply more moving notes - during the first few minutes of this piece. The pace at which it changes is typically very slow, and when it does change, the transition is very sudden (e.x., 3:28). I also think the mixing is a little strained at around 3:30 and beyond. It’s hard to hear the kick. You might want to scale back the reverb a bit - that could help clean things up. The clap at 4:33 sounds a bit weak - usually claps or snares that play on the off beat in 4/4 should be the loudest instruments of the mix, and this is no exception. The hats there also sounded a bit cliche. Overall, there isn’t a lot of rhythmic variety in this piece at all. There are a lot of straight ⅛ notes between the harmonies and melody lines. I think you need some stronger melodies with more rhythmic variety and directionality. I liked the melody at 6:15, even if it was a little simple and repetitive. Couldn’t hurt to bring it out more in the mix, either. I really don’t think there’s enough material and variety here to justify the piece being over 10 minutes long. At the very least, you should use more dynamics and phrasing to give this piece a little more shape. There was another awkward transition at 7:53, and some dynamics changes or filtering leading up to it could help foreshadow the section with increased energy that follows. Overall, I think your main areas of focus should be cleaning up the mix and consolidating your ideas in the composition to speed up the pace. Keep at it, man.

5/10

I really enjoyed the atmoshpere it gave at the beginning, but as it progressed nothing too new was intoduced, and it got very repeditive. For a song like this, i would recomend more changes like micro tension and macro tension. Both key players, the percussion doesnt seem to fit the spacey description you gave it as well. Concert drums and impacts seem like it would suit it better, just something i noticed. Also with the length? At least more progression changes or silences and pressure. something thay flows. a story does not repeat, if that helps. If this seems very critical, it is. Haha. i dont hate it though i can see potential from this. Best of luck :)
-Colin

Great

Credits & Info

Author

Listens
553
Downloads
10
Score
Waiting for 3 more votes

Uploaded
Jun 18, 2017
10:00 PM EDT
Genre
Video Game
File Info
Song
9 MB
10 min 10 sec

Licensing Terms

Please contact me if you would like to use this in a project. We can discuss the details.