I like the atmosphere and mystery at the beginning. The instruments mesh really well and help create a great sense of build over the course of the first minute or so. The panning was a nice touch too. The transition at 1:32 was a bit abrupt, and I wish you had done more to smooth it over (added a crash, preemptive drum fill, etc.). I also thought the next section with the whirring sounds was a little drawn out, and then the whirring sounds stop pretty suddenly once you faded in the next section at 2:27. I liked the intricate rhythms of the pizzicatos at around 2:38, but I thought it sounded a bit too minimalistic without any other percussion or bass. Eventually, the percussion comes back in along with this beautiful woodwind line at 3:04. There are a lot of cool isolated riffs and harmonies here, but overall the piece has little sense of coherence. During the 2nd half of the piece (2:30 - end), the piece is reminiscent of a series of solos in the middle of a band piece. This lack of succinctness detracts from the piece overall, unfortunately. The ending was rather enjoyable, though, and the mixing and mastering here are solid throughout. You’ve adopted a lot of disparate melodic themes here without connecting or developing them in any meaningful way, replacing them in jarringly rapid succession. Approaches like this can work, but you’ve got to flesh out these themes more and connect them more carefully if that’s the case. Right now, you have some rough transitions (such at 3:21) that don’t effectively bridge the gap between these ideas. It’s this lack of both connectivity and overarching development that constitute my main concerns with this piece. That said, I love the instrumentation and mood. You’ve given this piece a full-textured and unique sound design, and the frequencies are well-balanced and clear throughout. Overall solid work! Keep at it, man. ;)
You did an excellent job of taking a concept and turning it into music. The only thing this piece is lacking is a more lively and exciting percussion section (especially in the climax towards the end with the strings). Other than that, fantastic job. And I love how much artistic thought you put into this piece, cuz ya' know, to some people, music isn't an art and to see people put as much artistic depth into a piece as you did really gives me joy.
I'm glad it does! Music /is/ an art to me, and I use it to portray things that I wouldn't be able to do otherwise.
Fortunately, the song won't be judged in the contest until July 27th, so I'll go back an see what I can do with that!
Wow! This is great. It really does feel like a story. Incredible work! One thing I will say though: some of the instruments feel just a tad bit - like - repetitive (if that's the word for it)? It just kinda feels that some instruments are used throughout the track and kinda bore me out at points. Other than that though, this is wonderful. Good luck with your submission! Cheers :)
That's something I haven't actually approached in full yet, though I will be working on it over the next few days. It's probably one of the last few things I need to do to this song lol
*Edit* I updated the song a little bit. It should clear up a little bit of that repetitiveness a tiny bit, short of me completely redoing the ending. Any thoughts?
(Be sure to clear your cache to hear the updated song.)