gather around children, for the story of Tha Greatest Grunge Song in Tha History Of The woRld
The year was 1991. I was sitting in my malibu beachside studio when i got a phone call. It was GD aka "Tha Poor Man's Peter Frampton". He breathed heavily on the receiver, but I knew it was him.
"what is it, G-man" i said, breaking the silence.
"I Have Thought Of A Fantastic Song.....But I Need You To Be Tha Quincy Jones To My MJ...Tha George Martin To My Beatles...Tha Mannie Fresh to My Weezy"
I was silent for a moment. Then I spoke.
"GD....what you are asking of me, is no easy feat."
"I Know Papa Bear...But I'm Askin"
I flew out to his studio in Russia (that's where he lives). It was a cold, Russian winter. It was so cold that his russian maid Oulga had frozen snot boogers on her nose. She was promptly fired.
We got in the studio and the G-ster laid down the axe. What a beut it was, a 1961 Les Paul, mint condish'. He summoned the darkness and angst that only Lou Reed could rival as he shredded his heart into the guit. I cannot lie, my penis tremble with each stroke of his pick.
It was my turn 2 step up. I took my case that I had brought with me.
"What Kinda Bass Is U Rockin, 4Keezy?"
"i knew this was a special occassion, so i brought tha bes"
upon opening the case, JeeD33's eyes widened so much they were as big as dinner plates.
"Thas A 1937 Fender Jazz Bass...Tha Vary Same That Pall McaRtney Used On tha Song Imagine By Tha Beatles!!!!!"
Finaly, we enlisted the help of Slap Happy aka based snare god tha kidd. He beat tha fucc outta that snare. he beat the fuckin piss an shit outta that snare breh, i tell u that much.
it was so overwhelming the entire studio could not withstand the force and exploded. I died. Slappy died. GD clung to life with a copy of the usb that held the mp3 of the song you are currently hearing.
he threw tha usb at Oulga as she was still crying about being fired for her gross snot boogers.
"Oulga....Take This USB. Release It To Tha World. Do Something With Your Life You Ugly Snotty Booger Bytch." it was then that Katrill took his last brefs an died.
Oulga sniffled dramtically and got into her car. She drove all the way to america. She found Ryan, a wizard of memes and mythic memery. "Ryan...I am Oulga....I need You To Reverse The Hands Of Time Before 4kizzle, Giggleberry and SlappyHappy died recording this song, but I want you to give them the MP3.
"You said your name was Oulga?"
Oulga shook her head. "No....call me by my real name....LSD"
Ryan nodded. He summoned all of his memgic powers and chanted a mighty chant. "imgurimgurimgurimgur"
suddenly we were alive again. Ryan stood before us.
"Boys, Do Not Record this Song Or You Will Become a 1 Hit Wunder" he dissappeared in a flash of smoke and we never saw him again.
Now the year is 2014. After careful consideration, I have decided to release the song to the world. I wanted to share the painful backstory with you before you vote 5.