One Thousand Pens

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EDIT: I guess the site's down as of 09/12/15. Hm. Hope it comes back someday. It was a site where the internet would write a book by voting on one word at a time. Don't try to go there, it's rife with some spammy virus crap or whatever now.

"Joey was a asteroid from NEPTUNE . But he never cumonmynipnip politely . Kevin said "Why don't we KillKayneWest with a motherfucking Christmas tree?" so Kanye sucked a FishStick covered in aidsblood . Joey was fapping furiously to his only photograph of his butt . Henceforth , Joey was considered a gay fish . Nobody could masturbate like Joey when he was eating fishsticks until he met Kanye during a orgy . Kim Jong Un was diddling aGayFish while Hitler ate Hamster cake . Ironically ,Joey andHitler agreed to kill Allah with a COW anus. Joey started to fap furiously again for shrek andDonkey Kong . Meanwhile at McDonalds jesus ordered a McGangBang with extra cum and ASideOf period blood . Joey was ontheMoon to find a Jew forHitler to blow . He loved blowjobs from Shrek because Shrek is love Shrek is life . Hitler sempai noticed that a rapist was raping GeorgeZimmerman in the anus and he was a pussy . " Wow such FORCE " said Hitler as he started to masturbate FURIOUSLY to Zimmy . Meanwhile Jesus was cooking meth for Heisenberg and GOD . Another motherfucker named Rocky LeFucker started to masturbate on Spongebob 's Pineapple . Suddenly , Squidward . /thread MyMomGotScared, andsaid " N***a HODOR . " Come to Bel-air . Joey rattled. himself into Oblivion . Afterwards, Kanye and Kim fucked a Daedra . " Finally TheROCK (Johnson) became Hercules . His Biceps consumed theUniverse . TheEnd CHAPTER2 : A Curiously HangingPenis . A curiously hangingpenis was hanging from a curious hanging penis . However, a dickbutt Monster unexpectedly killed Hitler . " HEIL COCKS " senpai whispered RAPE TIME MOTHERFUCKER , BUTTHOLE TIME MOTHERFUCKER . Curiously. Nietzsche . GODisDEAD . Again . CHAPTER3 : A BRITISH BONGBONGBONG EBOLA!!!!!! Jesus Christ ! SoMuchEbola BONGBONGBONG Heisenberg said. " Meth+Ebola= Methbola " "Oh." "My." "God." MY ANUS IS BLEEDING !!!!! From all the methbola . Also, I like 9/11 , Allah ! Snackbar ! CHAPTER4 : Ebola+Apples= Applebola sluts . GABEN confirmed Hitler's death 3 : Episode 420 BLAZEIT . Edition Illuminati DLC . The almighty Cthulhu was being a ValveDev for moot . "IDontGetIt" said Santa " Why do you insist on sucking GABEN'S NIPPLES " "Because EA are a bunch of grapes . " Hitler was fucking Gaben in the HL3 . " Spongebob Anus was bleeding fries from his been diddlyhole ." This is the most aroused I have ever been since the release of HL2 . " No FKHERRIGHTINTHE nope.avi , CrabbyPatties arePEOPLE !!! ! !! !!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CHAPTER5 : Gabens WILD Mr.Goatcock . Pikachu finally admitted that he was a Digimon . Ash was aroused because he saw Gabens huge shlong . " Golly , I am aroused by Gabens huge MAGNUMDONG ! " Suddenly, is it Obama? Yes it is ! ;) Gaben spoke to Obama and advised him to nuke Canada . Obama agreed and BOOM! b--b-baka Canada was ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ dongered ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ . ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ Ketchup Mustard Mayo and Semen everywhere ,sadly . BodyPillow sex with an elephant woman shemale gave me AIDS . I : CHAPTER 69 : Chicken_Soup with Donald Duck . The Hash Slinging Slasher was whipping Donald's Succulent clitoris face with his spaghetti dick while Gaben ate Heroine from Hermione Granger 's cave of Glory ."

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A masterpiece of what the internet is

Gianni responds:

The internet is a reflection of the hideous masterpiece inside of us all. Dare you gaze into the dirty mirror's shattered image, only to realize that the mirror is perfect and the image is what you really are? If you used the internet today, you dared.

Whoa, that was something else. Entirely expected, if you let the internet write you a story. But fun non' the less.
Great voice acting.

Gianni responds:

With the internet, we're all immortal. Let that terrify you as you realize this inevitably associates your being with the shameless mass of Hitler jokes, satirical racists, real racists, and what has numbers high enough to call itself "trending".

Then scowl with disgust as you remember,

this is YOUR, OUR generation. Regardless of age, being alive in it associates us with this timeframe. The same way one thinks of a 70s dude, one will think this of me, and all of us one day.

Immortality never tasted so bitter.



I feel it's high time that the official SirUndead soundboard was released to the public.

Gianni responds:

Dylan, before you make any hasty decisions, I'd like to remind you that a traditional soundboard uses audio clips from multiple sources, and not just one.

One Thousand Pens is basically Internet: The Soundboard: The Book.

PURE, HIGH-OCTAINE FUN! AHAHAA, GOD, YOU ALWAYS KNOW HOW TO CRACK ME UP YOU RASCawait, what was that last part about blowing up Cana-

Gianni responds:

I aim to displease and I always hit my mark.

Credits & Info


4.29 / 5.00

Jul 31, 2014
12:35 AM EDT
Spoken Word
File Info
4.3 MB
4 min 45 sec

Licensing Terms

Please contact me if you would like to use this in a project. We can discuss the details.