Add more sauce, more instruments, more complex underlying patterns throughout the song.
In average more sojunds at the same time. Hypnotize by overwhelming the lsierners mind so that he does not remember correctly and so will be amazed for years to come everytime he listens. Ex: Chaoz Fantasy.
The biggest con was repetition.
Listening to a song alone does make it more critical. What activity does this song fit with?
Looks like you had fun :)
Nice! Good job mate.
Please contact me if you would like to use this in a project. We can discuss the details.