Okay, so I haven't worked out the instrumental part properly yet (it's literally just me stumbling through the chords as best I can with no backing tracks) but it seems to be shaping up into something reasonably decent anyway. Hopefully I'll be able to record this with my actual guitarist in higher quality sometime soon.
It's about a guy who swallowed his favourite piece of furniture and he wants it back but it's gone forever and it's totally tragic and lamentable but what are you going to do? Also, he's bedridden because he swallowed a coffee table whole. Pretty heavy stuff, right?