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The Ballad of JJ Binks

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Author Comments

After a recording of the 3x2cast(.com) focused on Star Wars, I sat down in a caffeine-induced haze, and let the confusion between Ep 7 director JJ Abrams and Ep 1 mistake Jar Jar Binks, lead me down the paths of song. This is the result. And they're not pretty.

Recorded and edited entirely in Audacity, with no instruments but my guitar and voice.

And some godawful lyrics:

JJ binks, you dirty motherfucker you ruined Star Wars for me.
Since Episode 1 it's been no fun with your flappy face on the screen.
In every scene on that very screen I wanted to see you dead,
By a blaster or two from the droid that shot you or a lightsaber to the head.

But every time my hopes were dashed and you somehow got away,
and no matter how bad the others were glad when you fucked up and saved the day.

JJ binks, you dirty motherfucker they gave you the director's seat.
Well what the heck, after you ruined Trek with a demo real that can't be beat.
So in a year or two the mouse and you will kill Han, Luke and Leia dead.
You'll put your ass in there with a little lens flare and we'll go watch Ep 4 instead.

I'm talking pre-Special Edition, minus all the digital shit,
That Lucas added because he could. And well Han...
Well, Han shot first. You know it, I know it, the whole world knows it. And George?
George knows it.

JJ binks, you dirty motherfucker don't ruin Star Wars for me
You're the digital man with the Gungan plan that just happens to be,
Hope for my Star Wars fix, so please don't dick with it and make it suck.
Or they'll call in Michael Bay to save the day and then we're really fucked.
JJ Binks.
Dirty fucking JJ Binks.


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Credits & Info

3.36 / 5.00

May 27, 2014
2:58 PM EDT
File Info
2.4 MB
1 min 46 sec

Licensing Terms

Please contact me if you would like to use this in a project. We can discuss the details.