I think you got pretty close to what you were aiming for. There's definitely a cinematic kind of feel to it, where the song progresses as if telling a story. Something about cymbals and what I think was a hihat was bugging the crap out of me. It sounds kind of hollow where I feel like it ought to ring out. I like everything else but the intro. Solid metal. Overall, I thought it was really good.
Thanks man, every vote counts :D But yeah, ever since I changed recording software I've had that problem with the hollow sound coming from my symbols. And I'm too broke for something like EZDrummer (which I really want too D:). I'll do what I can with the drums in the meantime.