The song needs to go somewhere, at the moment this sounds very experimental/ambient. Sounds awesome, but needs structure and melody.
I honestly don't know what to think of this piece. It seems like a good start but it seemed to have lack inflection; the piece stayed at the same spot the entire time, there was no temporal shift or melodic change. On a side note, I would've attenuated the sound of (what seemed like shakers to me, that sharp sifting sound, I can't think of how else to describe it) because it annoyed me but it would have worked better as a background sound. I think you have a good start here that needs to be expanded on. Don't give up, this can still be a greater piece! :D