Good to see effort put into tracks.
I don't care if it shows or not, your still getting 10 for effort.
Lets start from the top.
The piano was very plain, and should be mastered to a higher frequncy so that it stands out as being a 'melody'. If this means that you need to turn it down, just lessen the amount that it plays, so be it. It would also be great if you threw on a reverb, just so it sounds a little more full.
I like great transitions, so I think I'll be picking on you for that :P The song is well thought out, and the effort DOES show. Just the transitions need work. The first break in, with the drums, was a simple rev crash into the drums. I can't recall if there was a crash, but if there wasn't add one. And also add a good old drum break in, like a simple 16th note roll on the last beat, that slightly fades in. It gives the listeners a heads up, and makes listening much more pleasureable.
The song is good in volume, but I hear some slight distortion in spots. If you don't have a compressor on the main master channel, put one on. It will save the slightest amount of clippage.
Holy shit I think the song just looped. I didn't even freaking notice. How the fuck do you get such clean loops...? Amazing. Anywho...
I think, so the song has more of a sense of rythym, you should turn the strings down a tad, they seem to dominate the song, even over the soft synth melody. Remember, if you work hard on a particular part in the song, it doesn't nessescarily need to be loud. The drums kick should be louder, or a higher frequency (just so it cuts through the song a bit more) and the snare could also be a slightly higher freuqncy, (high freuqncies cut through mid and low range frequencies, so if you want someting to be louder, EQ it higher.)Make use of reverb on the drums. It would make them sound nice and purty :)
Good work, you keep on getting better all the time.
Keep it up!
PS: Also, thank you for the review you dropped me. Its much appreciated :D