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Marriage Counselor

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For Voice Acting Contest 9, the theme being horrible jobs. I ended up getting third place! <3

Here's the dialogue:

--door close--

(Doctor) Yeah good luck with that train wreck y'all got goin' on you two! Sigh. Man, I hope these newcomers got even a third of the problems dat last couple had.

--door open--

(Doctor) Ah shoot. Y'all really right on time.

--door close--

(Marty) Well isn't that the point of making an appointment? So you don't miss it?

(Doctor) Why sure. So uh...where's the missy?

(Marty) Ha ha ha ha. She's collecting herself. Say, are you really a doctor?

(Doctor) Yessiree. Name's Dr. Cannatunafish. Studied fer 5 years at the university 'cross the river down Route 12.

(Marty) Ahahh...and what was the name of the university?...

(Doctor) Uhh...the University 'Cross the River Down Route 12.

--door open--

(Sam) Sorry I'm late. Ran into a couple that was leaving and gave them some pointless advice as I judged their horrible outfits.

--door close--

(Doctor) Whoa whoa whoa! You two a buncha queers?!

(Sam) Uh...is that a problem because I can invest my money elsewhere.

(Doctor) Uh no no no no no. I love yer hard earned...American money...naw please sitchur self down next to yer...partner here. So tell me y'all where yer issues at?

(Sam) Marty's sucha pussy. He never wants to hang out with me.

(Marty) Wrong. We went to that...thing...whatever event last Friday.

(Sam) And you flaked out at midnight after having one drink and said that you'd see me at home. What the fuck Marty.

(Marty) I had to wake up early!

(Sam) For what, you liar! You don't even have a fucking job!

(Marty) To pick up those preposterous diet pills of yours, since you're too extravagant to show your face at a grocery store!

(Sam) Don't hate me cuz I'm beautiful!

(Marty) ...what?

(Doctor) Now, calm down y'all. Uhp...

(Sam) Sam.

(Doctor) Sam, how long Marty over there been without a job?

(Sam) Almost a year now, and he hasn't done a damn thing about it.

(Marty) That's not fair! I had a temp job...

(Sam) UGH. Of course you have to bring up that pathetic temp job. All that paid for was my birthday party...which SUCKED.

(Marty) GASP. I got you that stripper you always wanted from that filthy lounge.

(Sam) He was really fugly up close. I thought you woulda caught that. But I guess you never get out of the house enough to know what real people look like.

(Marty) Yes...the only real person I get to see is a fake bitch.


--argument banter--



(Doctor) I want y'all ta say this with me. I say, Jesus.

(Sam & Marty) ...Jesus.

(Doctor) I say, take me in ya armz.

(Sam) ...are we gonna get killed?

(Doctor) And tell me what I need to say, hallelujah!


(Marty) ...should we go-?

(Doctor) AHP! Sweet Lord! He has told me! He has told me-!

--door open--

(Ms. Larry) Dawkta Cannatunafish, ya got Kim an' Wesley waitin' outside. Should I tell them to come in?

(Doctor) Yes! Sure! Git on you two! Git! Git!

--confused banter--

--door close--

(Doctor) Ms. Larry?

(Ms. Larry) Yes dawkta. Let me rub ya shoulders.

(Doctor) No that's fine Ms. Larry. Just please...it's time...

(Ms. Larry) Oh I completely understand dawkta. Just like Trisha says, I'm a great listener.

(Doctor) No Ms. Larry...I mean...I can't take it anymore.

(Ms. Larry) Oh dawkta. Don't worry. I got your medicine right under this cabinet here...


(End Narrator) And so, Dr. Cannatunafish went straight to heaven to rejoice in the light of the Lord and His children forever...and ever...Amen.

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This was great actually.
Dr.Cannatunafish's voice could have used some work to me, like a different actor for him, but overall It was actually very funny. I would like to see this animated in some way, because really I could see about 5 or 6 episodes with Marty and Sam. 4/5


Acting- 47/50
Range- 25/25
Fit- 20/25
Mixing- 15/20
Originality- 13/15
Writing- 15/15
TOTAL- 135/150
I'm not sure if there's a reverb from your recording space or if you added some echo, but either way it should have been removed if possible. Also there was either dead air or it was part of the ambiance you chose and again, I would have taken that out if possible. Only dialog and a few SFX would have been fine. Your voices are varied nicely. Your best voice was the stereotypical gay voice, but they were all pretty good. The counselor's voice was kind of forced and went all over the place throughout the skit. When he started crying, it would have been better if you turned it up a notch. Overall, other than the background issues, the mixing was pretty good. I really enjoyed the skit and it made me laugh out loud. You do great characterization and I encourage you to keep making skits, possibly a demo and audition for some productions!

Acting: 48/50
Range: 25/25
Fit: 25/25
Mixing: 19/20
Originality: 13/15
Writing: 15/15
TOTAL: 145/150
Additional Comments: Amazing range. If I was to nitpick it would be that the doctors voice wasn't PERFECTLY consistant throughout the clip, but pretty frickin close to perfect. Entertaining.

Acting: 35
Range: 15
Fit: 24
Mixing: 19
Originality: 15
Writing: 13
Total: 121
Review: You have a pretty good concept here, a tired doctor having to deal with couple's problems everyday. Certainly a bad job. With your acting however it seemed a little flat and forced. More emotion is what was needed here, it was just a little to dry for my tastes. Your Range also was around the same register, also the doctor sounds like a different person in the end than he was in the beginning. Consistencey is key. Your mixing was well done, a few things here and there such as some some pops and clicks nothing big. I really liked how you had the couple talking over each other. Your writing was good but could have been polished a little more I think. Overall, I think you did a pretty good job here and I can't wait to hear more from you.

Total 140/150
Your acting with the doctor is perfect, even with that thick accent you managed to get his emotions/expressions across exceptionally well. Everyone else was also very good. although I can make out a few similarities amongst the doctor and couple here and there, they are very subtle and don't deter your work much. The bitchy diva voice was BRILLIANT! The hillbilly doctor and secretary voices were an amazing fit as well. Par use of sound effects, and an good choice of music for the conclusion, nice job. Meh.. Marriage counsunler... Wait a second, hes a hillbilly..? HIS PATIENTS ARE GAY!? WUUUUUUT!? nice creative twist to what would of been a cliche skit. You throw in a lot of plot twists in here, probably as a creative way to keep things interesting, the plots thick and it makes sense overall.

Great job!
I really liked this piece, and am extremely nervous about my submission now haha

Credits & Info


Waiting for 1 more vote

Sep 12, 2012
6:11 PM EDT
Voice Demo
File Info
7.1 MB
4 min 25 sec

Licensing Terms

Please contact me if you would like to use this in a project. We can discuss the details.