Alright, real review.
You haven't added much to this song excluding the drums. Even there you lacked in the most important part - the kick. It had no kick, it was just a roll over. Although everything else about the drums I admired.
Lay off the crusher, it looses its effect if it's done way too much. What you added in the end what seemed like a few chords were doing okay then you started to hit some bad notes.
Keep working at it. It was better than my first attempt at this song.