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The Jersey Sore

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Author Comments

A while back I released the instrumental version with a comment that read "If you want the lyrics, leave a review".

No one ever left a review, but I live my life by idle threats...

So here's the full version:

The S(h)ore
Ryan Johnson

In B Dorian (key of A major)

Bm - E - Em - A (Constant)

Song Structure: ABCBC

Verse 1(A)
(Spoken) This is a...story, of sorts, about eight guido douche bags plucked from cities surrounding the Metropolitan area and placed to live in a Seaside Heights beach house. For one month cameras followed their every move and recorded the entirety of their sad lives on tape. MTV then edited the footage to make the characters seem even more absurd. This is the Jersey Sore.

(Spoken) Bound together by the urge to party harder, they took to the streets every night, disgracing Italian culture. With each bar they stopped at and each fist pump they threw into the air, their need to rage and act more outlandish intensified. That summer, their bodies became hosts to an infectious pseudo-celebrity disease that numbed all inhibitions and spread like wildfire to households all across America.

Verse 2(B)
Big chains. Little brains. Want fame. Insane.
No chance. Can't dance. Enhanced bromance.
Axe spray in hair. Perfume'd underwear.
Hoop rings. Cheap bling. Chugs drinks. Groupthink.
Needs less. Wants more. Skank dressed. Class whores.
Spray tan groomed clowns. One plan : "Sleep around!"
Shots shots. Sleeveless tops. Get caught by the cops.
Act frail. Hate jail. Cover tail. Make Bail.


The shore...is where it's at...to find...a hot dog and a dirty needle.
Don't go...to to shore...unless you want...to pay to use a crappy beach.

P.S. I made a crappy video to go along with it...check my news feed!

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Lmfao, this song is hilarious. Every lyric in this song gives the most realistic, comical, concise, (and in my opinion) accurate summary of the reality of the show. I usually try not to think about things like Jersey Shore, but in this context anyone could... and not feel like they watched a show that stained their mind.

RyeGuyHead responds:

I'm glad you could appreciate it without my singing staining your mind :D

Credits & Info


Waiting for 3 more votes

Oct 12, 2011
3:50 PM EDT
File Info
4.4 MB
3 min 3 sec

Licensing Terms

Please contact me if you would like to use this in a project. We can discuss the details.