Be a Supporter!

Credits & Info

Aug 24, 2011 | 10:58 PM EDT
File Info
14.9 MB
16 min 18 sec
4.28 / 5.00

Related Content

Heard in 1 Entry!

  • The Meek
    The Meek by ClockCrew
    • Movie
    • Rated T

View all submissions featuring this audio file.

Licensing Terms

Please contact me if you would like to use this in a project. We can discuss the details.

Rated 4.28 / 5 stars
Plays & Downloads:
9,343 Plays | 259 Downloads
Share Links:
Electronic - Ambient

Author Comments

Hey everyone, this track is a long one! It's pretty much the audio form of a short indie film. I would recommend downloading this track and listening to it on an mp3 player while walking around, at night if safe, for the beat experience. I completely understand that there will be people who do not wish to listen to a 16 minute ambient song, but rest assured THIS IS NOT REPETETIVE DRONE lol. It is a vivid soundscape, progressing into different tones and themes. Be patient, listen before bed, open your mind a bit, and try something different. ;)

I made this track to represent my thoughts while depressed. I was feeling almost "insane" for a while, driving for hours on end to try and calm my thoughts and place everything together. I would go for walks at night in the woods, watching trees pass by me. I would sit in my dorm and just stare at the ceiling. I couldn't possibly describe what emotions I felt during this depression, but after all of it was over I decided to try and convert it into music. I do this with most of my ambient tracks, and after five months of work I am finally done with this 16 minute opening to my upcoming progressive ambient album, "N".

I spent the majority of the five months it took to write this track piecing together my thoughts into what I thought would best express them. I don't expect everyone to like this track of course, because it is very experimental. I would absolutley, positivley, love to hear feedback on this track. If any imagery comes to mind, then please don't hold them back. By all means, feel free to expand your mind and, when ready, put on your headphones, open up a window, sit down, relax, go for a walk, or do whatever you feel will help you best engulf yourself in this track.

What this track actually "means" or "represents" is all up to you, the listener. It can be a relaxing track to help open up your mind, a track to help recover lost memories, background noise for a game, an interesting listen to break from "normal" music, or just a complete pile of crap because I know not everyone enjoys ambient, heh.

Anyway, I always enjoy expressing myself through this sort of music and hope you enjoy it. I worked pretty hard on it, and am glad to have finally finished it. Enjoy! By the way, for those of you out there who support my music... thank you, thank you, and thank you. Knowing that people enjoy what I make really gives me this great feeling inside. The fact that people understand it is even more incredible. Love you guys <3. I am always up for chatting, so send me a PM and let's talk and stuff.




Rated 5 / 5 stars

This is...

Awe inspiring. I have many hours of ambient i listen to everyday. Ranging from steve roach to carbon based lifeforms. Those artists hold high prase with me for i'm really picky with music and they keep it smooth. Now this sequence... its amazing! Just the right amount of leveling... Perfect soundscapes... i can tell you spent a very long time with this. I am actually making this song you made here a part of my "journey plus" playlist. This is the only playlist i actively listen to everytime i program and game... i dont just put any song there... you win! Also... please keep sending me updates!

People find this review helpful!
FatKidWitAJetPak responds:

Woowww... Comparing me to expert artists such as carbon based lifeforms and Steve Roach is inspirational man. I just recently discovered them and I must say, their music drowns me in amazing euphorias. You code? Freaking bodacious! I'm a computer geek myself, actually I'm working for apple currently, so thanks for adding me to your amazing playlist!


Rated 5 / 5 stars

I gladely repost my review ^^

I´ve been looking for a good and long ambient track for a while to meditate to and I think this track will do great :D It really calms me down and I can feel the emotions in it. Tracks this long is like a whole history, who needs movies when you could listen to tracks like this and just let the imagination do the rest it can transform into a great journey inside your head :) Anyway great track and great jobb and I really appreciated the PM so that I was able to know that there was a new track to listen to :)

People find this review helpful!
FatKidWitAJetPak responds:

Exactly. If you just relax and let your mind do the work, music can really cause some vivid images! Enjoy the meditation :)


Rated 5 / 5 stars

As requested, old friend.

The first 2 minutes of this....have been amazing.

I am having trouble leaving my body but then I see that possibly there's something good in this world around the...3 minute mark or something I'm guessing. I feel invigorated to do something, but am surrounded by darkness even as I step into the light. I feel myself being drawn toward something outside of the darkness, and it feels regal and electronic. I sense that being a master musician would be a great accomplishment, I see my fingers thumping on the keys, and flashes of brilliance. I feel on top of my career, yet something is missing, something human and within arms reach. The electronics take over and its on to forgetting myself and worrying about music, yet the depression mutes even the brilliance. A constant fight against the waves and we're only a 1/4 of the way through. Getting closer something...anything for fucks sake. Just keep driving, keep that pedal down and hopefully we'll get there... and the music disappears again.

Alone again, with just my thoughts and a small quiet beat to keep me going, probably losing focus on my career and loves and hopes, to fade out into friends. No family. No hobbies. No feelings. Just me in a world of shadows. I am cold, and alone, and only want someone.

A tide washes up against this beach, this desert island that I've made my home over these long years. I don't even know how to interact anymore with other people. The rescue boat sways in the waves as it cuts towards civilization. I shiver in a blanket and sip cocoa, staring out at the waves. The time I was alone was forever. I contemplated suicide, but it seemed boring, and plus I held out hope that someday rescue would come and I could go back to being a normal human. That wish seems so far away, so vague. What is normal anymore? I have been gone so fucking long.

I steady my resolve, a broken man slumped against a wall with nothing but a blanket and beard to his name. I stand up, facing the morning sun at the 12 minute mark, and I see the birds flying over the harbor. I hear the foghorn off in the distance and I know that this is not my destiny. But what is my destiny?

I remember terrible things that I dare not repeat, I feel the haunting sacrifices I've made to take this secret to the grave, and as the birds fly I notice they are crows sent to watch over me. The devil has its claws in my past, present, and future. God is going to voicemail, and Jesus isn't online. I don't know who to turn to, but I feel the evil around me swelling and growing. Its overwhelming. My eyes dart from left to right as the town turns to fog and I am alone at the 15 minute mark.

Clouds of black acrid smoke choke me and as I aspyxiate on the ground I see the reason for all of this. It was never about the happiness, it was about the sadness. Confusion grips me and I jump in headfirst and swim swiftly for the bottom of the ocean. Pain grips my lungs and all that is heard is the blub-blubbing of the air leaving my body for the last time. Finally, some peace.

People find this review helpful!
FatKidWitAJetPak responds:

I find it extremely interesting how people can listen to my tracks and come up with these vivid imagery concepts. I find that listening to this while driving, or walking, or moving at all for that matter, can really help expand and open your mind to such thoughts.

It may seem corny to some, but these sorts of thoughts are all respected on a much more personal level. These thoughts being respected on a personal level is awesome, and is what "enlightenment" is called in Budhism, along with terms such as "astral projection". When they are felt by other people, you have truly expressed yourself fully. Since I have composed something to make you write such detailed imagery, I have truly accomplished something. Thank you for sharing your passion :D

You really felt many themes I was going for and hi some of my own thoughts spot on. Isolation, abyss, loneliness, confusion, love, and peacefulness are a few of the themes you covered well in your imagery. Nice writing! :li loved your thought of the ocean.


Rated 5 / 5 stars


i am a critic, and i love music, whatever you perceive "music" to be, and so as i am not an expert on ambiance, i CAN say i appreciate beautiful things, and this was a roller coaster of a trip. i would love to work with you, but i know there is no reality in that, however i do wish to someday work with you if both of us become successful in what we love to do. peace out and keep it up

People find this review helpful!
FatKidWitAJetPak responds:

Man that blows me away. You know, we can still work together. I am doing a possible collab with an online user I know named "KKSlider", so you could totally join in with us :)

Keep doing what you do! I'll check out your stuff.