Eat your food now, and then write, write, write!
The first thing I have to say is that this sounds like a smelly, over-crowded, no-budget basement show inside of my ears right now. That would be a good thing, except inside of my headphones all of the instrument layers you have pile up until they start distorting everything (no mastering)! The dueling guitar idea is cool too, but it just doesn't sound that good with the guitar voice you have (you could try panning one of the guitars). All of that said, my favorite part of the song is 0:50 until the end... It sounds great! I feel like you have one really good song segment down, and you just need to write some more. So eat your food now, and then write, write, write! Good luck! 3/5 + 7/10.
PS. You did some pretty sweet drum programming! If you don't write anymore, it will still sound okay! Peace!