"Friendship is Paramount" is by Seth "Beatfox" Peelle of the Homestuck Music Team.
Lyrics by the unaffiliated York Bezbozny.
EB: Hey Karkat,
EB: My friend
EB: How's things over on your end?
CG: WHAT ARE YOU DOING.
EB: I just wanted to let you know I'm glad that you're my friend.
CG: WHY ARE YOU SINGING?
EB: And don't you ever mind.
EB: what they say,
EB: My friendlieness will not ever stray.
CG: I'M GONNA VOMIT.
EB: Because always and forever will I be your friend.
CG: YOU SUCK.
EB: Heh, yeah.
CG: SO WILL YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP.
EB: You're so funny.
CG: I WILL HATE YOU FOREVER AND I THINK YOUR POWERS SUCK.
EB: Actually they blow.
CG: SERIOUSLY JUST STOP.
CG: THAT'S IT.
CG: THIS CONVERSATION'S REACHED ITS LIMIT.
CG: BECAUSE NEVER FUCKING EVER WILL I BE YOUR FRIEND.
EB: Come on Karkat, we're totally buds now.
CG: IN YOUR DREAMS EGBERT.
EB: Nah, my dreams mostly consist of flying and the color yellow.
CG: GAH! I HATE YOU!.
EB: You gotta admit were a league of fellows.
CG: I DON'T "GOT" TO ADMIT A SINGLE GOGDAMN THING.
CG: I GROW SICK AND TIRED OF YOUR PATHETIC BLUE TEXT.
CG: AND THIS IMPROMPTU SINGING IS GIVING ME A HEADACHE.
EB: Why don't you just go back and talk to me before I figured out you weren't such a bad guy?
CG YES! I WILL PSYCHOLOGICALLY DAMEGE YOU IN THE PAST SO THAT IN THE FUTURE, YOU WILL BE TOO RETARDED TO DEFEND YOURSELF! SEE YOU IN THE PAST EGBERT JOHN HUMAN!
EB: Okay Karkat, I look forward... er backward to it.
CG: HI AGAIN IDIOT.
PEB: God damn, leave me alone you animal!
CG: THAT'S RIGHT YOU SOLID CHUNK OF HYPER COOLED SPACE PISS, I'M A PACK OF HUMAN WOLVES, AND YOU WERE THROWN TO ME LIKE A HELPLESS WRIGGLER!
PEB: I know I'm gonna regret asking this, but who threw me to you?
CG: YOUR FUTURE SELF IS THE ONE. IT'S YOU.
PEB: Yep, I'm regretting it.
CG: I WAS TALKING TO YOUR FUTURE SELF WHEN I FELT THE NEED FOR A MORE PSYCHOLOGICALLY WEAK VICTEM, AND HE SAID "OH WHY NOT TROLL MY YOUNGER SELF, HE IS A WEAK MINDED HUMAN AFTER ALL."
CG: THAT IS MY PATHETIC JOHN HUMAN VOICE DO YOU LIKE IT?
PEB: Yeah alright, I get it, what your saying is in the future I become a raging prick.
PEB: And I'm constantly spewing bullshit from my mouth like some anti toilet, but for bulls.
PEB: Yep, future me is a total asshole.
CG: HEY! SHUT UP DUMPASS YOU CAN'T TALK ABOUT YOUR FUTURE SELF LIKE THAT! HE'S MY FRIEND, AND HE'S TWICE THE MAN YOU ARE!
PEB: Okay, seriously you have issues dude.
CG: AHHH CRAP, HE'S GONNA REMEMBER THIS CONVERSATION..... EH TALK TO YOU LATER PAST JOHN
CG: HEY PREASENT JOHN.
EB: Hey Karkat, so did you troll me real good.
CG: UH, YEAH, TOTALLY, BUT NOT IN A WAY THAT YOU WOULD EVER REMEMBER.
EB: Okay, well, you wanna sing?
CG: UGH. FINE, YOU WIN.
EB: Hey Karkat.
CG: HEY JOHN.
CG: DO YOU EVER HAVE TO GO TO THE JOHN?
CG: I WAS JUST WONDERING SINCE YOU'RE A GOD AND ALL, IF YOU HAVE TOO...
EB: I haven't tried yet
CG: HEY JOHN.
EB: Hey Karkat
EB: Your name kinda sounds like "Car Cat"
CG: YEAH NO SHIT.
EB: Uh, I guess were both getting a little off topic here.
CG: THEN LETS GET BACK!
(First refrains of John and Karkat replayed simultainiously)