Improvement really needed!
Good day, gentleman,
this piece has a lot to improve on.
Composition:
First of all, the rhythmic pattern is repetitive, try using variations of it or change it completely throughout the piece. Also a flaw I would like to state is the lack of varied dynamics. You can use changing time signatures like %u215E, %u215D or else to achieve a stretching or buckling in your structure - thus making it much more varied.
Instrumentation:
You use a unprepossessing instrumentation. The harp and flutes would never sound that loud in a real playing situation - especially because of the horn, which plays pretty loud. So I suggest to double those instruments with others - the harp with pizzicati strings and the flutes with other woodwinds for example. Another thing you can alter are the strings. They always play in the same low range - so i would suggest to let them play in different ranges or different playing styles. Try to use more of the whole range your ensemble/orchestra has.
Mixing:
All of your instruments sound pretty close. I suggest to give them some more reverb, place them in the room and do not forget about the propagation delay. The Harp is pretty loud, which is not possible to be heard like that in a real orchestra with that kind of instrumentation. You also need a much more wider sound, because in your piece it is mainly concentrated in the middle.
I hope we could help you.
Best regards,
Sir Edward Eisenworth