I am not really sure if this is actually a 'song'. It feels very random to me and not organised. The melody could use some more work on... putting random notes into the piano roll does not mean it's hard style.
Things to keep in mind for your next track: The arrangement, better build ups, better melodies, more percussion and the mix.
Keep practising, you got potential. Could you review back on my song? Criticism is appreciated.
In my opinion I don't think its 'very random' and it is organised. I guess you don't listen to much hardstyle as you mention 'more percussion' but that is hardstyle, but I'm not good enough to make the kick epic enough, mixing in snares and cymbals to a good kick makes it seem too cloudy.
I do agree in some parts with the melody but it is a hardstyle melody, I wouldn't say the best. But I don't just sit there with my thumb up my ass shoving random notes into the piano roll.
It would be nice if you could clarify 'better build ups' its little umm vague?