You can be proud
How I say in the summary, you can be proud. There are a lot of videogames that need this song for some of their characters in the OST's.
PS: The percussion is well like it is, a simple rythm, supporting other instruments.
You say the percussion is weak, but I actually find it works well that way, that way the main melody grabs your attention and keeps it's grip firm!
I especially like the running melody that arrives at :43 and how it remains, and when it finally disappears, you barely notice that it left.
Clean, crisp, grabbing, and well done.
Keep up the good work!
Please contact me if you would like to use this in a project. We can discuss the details.