Not that bad
This isn't that bad, there are some parts that you can't hear to well, so volume is a bit of a problem. I've noticed that in your contest entry as well. What program are you using to record? If it's audacity (which is free, if you don't have it) there is a tool in it called Noise Reduction, when you record have 5 seconds of silence before you start. It'll get rid of the background noise. Also it seems like you need a pop-filter. Cheap version is a hanger that you straighten out and make a 6 inch hoop on one end, then stretch one leg of a nylon over it and make it tight, keep that in between you and the mic and you should be golden. Keep it about 6 inches away from the mic. I'll PM you this info as well.