Ya need some work.
You're mastering is what mainly needs work. Your over all melody is good. Actually great... it's just thrown away by your mastering, and yes, mastering can make all the difference.
There were several things that stood out.
First thing that came to mind: The click, it's not the kick drum, but possibly the snare? It's just a click sound that's extremely high pitched, and blasts out loudly. Possibly drop the dynamics, or lower the volume...
The next thing was the bass. Or rather the high version of the bass. That came in at :34 It's tooo loud. It definitely should be lowered.
Then there was some texture... that for a while, stood on it's own. Which it's not bad itself, but it's also too loud.
Those 3 things really took away from my experience.
The ending with the tempo slowed down was a definite plus though. Keep that :D
Now this is the kind of input I like to hear!
I merely threw this together in literally 2 hours... it's a sampler for the few people that follow me to let them know that I'm back. I didn't actually devote any time to this, I'll re-release a mastered version, this was just raw soundloops, no mastering whatsoever... :D Thanks for the positive response though! :D
BTW - I like the icon for your profile... DOOM was epic in itself... Skulltag for the win! :D
I cannot release a mastered copy of this simply because I had a critical HDD failure coupled with a motherboard failure and had to buy this new lappy, but then just so happened to have a critical failure with the HDD again, so I replaced the HDD but now had to install linux because I didn't have a legit copy of windows for it, so yea... I'm in the red ATM... BUT, when I can afford to I will be buying a copy of Windows XP Professional and a new PC for that windows... T_T
You are free to copy, distribute and transmit this work under the following conditions:
*You may not use this work without making specific arrangements with the artist UNLESS your work is a web-based game or animation, in which case you may use this freely.