It's....

It's better than the first track I ever made on the PC. You've definately got the right idea - plenty of variation, but I'm pretty sure this is all MIDI. MIDI is good for practice in my opinion.

But when you're ready to make something with realistic-sounding instruments, you might want to get a better program such as Making Waves, Ableton Live, Reason, or even Logic (I'm presuming you aren't using any of these at the moment!)

Just to polish my review off though, you're definately headed in the right direction here. It seems to me that most artists who make music with a computer for the first time throw together some loops to form a songm with a program such as EJay.

Not bad

Not too bad for a first attempt. You might try spacing out the chord changes a little where the phrases get a little hard to divine. There's definitely a lovely theme in there, it just needs to be brought out and realized.