You have an amazing basic understanding of the song, it just needs more of a flow in the beginning. It sounds off because you hit the notes in a burst instead of a, well, flowing verse like the original. Some of the notes sound cut off. Not sure if you could quite understand that. Rest of the song is good though.
Yeah I did play it a bit out of tune but I wanted to remix it right away and start screwing around with the song :P
Was going to play it in a good rythm but just a bit to lazy and wanted to hear the response :P
Thanks for your review