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Day in the Life of Pirate Dave

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Credits & Info

Aug 26, 2009 | 11:00 AM EDT
File Info
1.4 MB
1 min 0 sec
4.14 / 5.00

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Rated 4.14 / 5 stars
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3,625 Plays | 124 Downloads
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Author Comments

Audio submission for Newgrounds' "Talk Like a Pirate Day 2009" competition. A little insight into Pirate Dave's day job as a patent attorney (junior partner). Sound effects from soundsnap. Script as below:

CAPTAIN: YARR! Enter, fellow murderous scab of the seven seas, yahar!

CREW1: Err... Hey there, Dave--

CAPTAIN: What kin I do fer ye, first mate Hookhands?

CREW1: It's Manuel, actually.

CAPTAIN: D'yarr! Tis no proper name for a pirate! Ye be needin' some HOOK or BLOOD or UNPLEASANT in thar!

CREW1: Aha, yeah about that - We've been talking. The "crew" and I?

CAPTAIN: Yarr, ye've been talking behind me back yarr.

CREW: And uhh.... we want you to hand over the hat.

CAPTAIN: Yarr. What hat?

CREW: THE hat. On your head.

CAPTAIN: Ye be wantin' the CAPTAIN'S HAT?

CREW: We weren't exactly sure how to tell you this--


CREW: Okay, this is exactly how I expected you to react - but--

CAPTAIN: I SEES IT NOW! MUTINY! YE PACK OF MOON-ADDLED SEA URCHINS! Well, ye may have taken me vessel! But ye kin never take - ME HAT! YAHAR!

CREW2: Hey Manuel, you got Dave's hat yet? We got the fire started and whoa. Awkward.

CREW2: Wasn't that from Braveheart?





Rated 5 / 5 stars

Edwyn, let me just say...

That was some of the most enjoyable 60 seconds I've experienced all week. Dave's craziness, the mate's escaping the loony bin, and just all of Dave's mannerisms. "Yar ye be talking behind me back, yar." Just everything one could ask for in pirate related

Yar, yee deserve a 10/10, the victory of this competition, the buried treasure worth 150 deblums...and all the corn in Iowa, lad. Excellent work, matey.


Rated 4 / 5 stars


I was actually taken aback when I read in another review that this was set in a patent office, guess it pays to read the description. On the first listen through I pictured a crew on a ship mutinying against the captain for talking like a pirate cliche. The second listen through I pictured it in the office setting. I can't decide which was funnier.

For my money this is one of the best. Hopefully someone will pick this one up.


Rated 5 / 5 stars

Oh wow noice

I can't make up mind! This is reeaaallly fantastic, too D:
Awe, I love this!!


Rated 5 / 5 stars

4.32 / 5.00 (+ 0.052)

lmfao it would be even funnier if it was a paper hat


Rated 5 / 5 stars


I love you.

Omahdon responds:

I love you too!

.... I mean. I love... the air. Ha. @_@