im not too sure what message is at all seen in this music. im sure there is one in there, i just dont see it. as for the first poster, yeah, start soft and grow louder, but i cant say too much on that because i dont know whta message was intended.
Nice first song
Pretty nice, especially since this appears to be your first song. The sound could definitely be cleaner, the part at 1:00~1:40 is a pretty glaring example. The dynamic changes are also bit too sudden and inconsistent for my taste. I'd recommend more everything starting out quiet and then getting louder throughout the song. Hope this helps, and I hope to see more stuff from you.