Good day, gentleman,
this piece has some flaws I would like to state in this review and give advice how to improve it.
This piece is actually a 20 seconds long loop with the same melody repeated over and over again, even in the finale because of the poor instrumentation. Try building up the melody throughout the piece, modulate it and write more music, to give it a structure. If you want to make a climatic piece of music, try to make a crescendo with every single instrument and make an even faster accelerando.
You use the same instrumentation all over the whole piece : the violins play the melody and the other strings accompany them. I suggest to play around with it by letting the celli/violas play the melody and let the violins play some different pizzicato lines for example. The use of different percussion is quite nice, but if you want to make it climatic you could spare some for the end. Maybe you should double the melody in the later parts to give it more power. Adding more instruments would also help you building up a climax of course.
You have got a fairly big problem with the mix, because you mixed each instrument with a different reverb. Give them one single reverb, place them in the room and do not forget the propagation delay.
This piece needs a lot more effort than this. I hope we could help.
Sir Edward Eisenworth