This is so funny. So simple, but so funny. Thanks for the lulz.
The part about the sock was helpful.
You sound a lot like Seth Rogen, you can definitely get a good voice acting job if you play your cards right.
I'll give you a chance... but I want my blowjob first.
Pure unfiltered win.
Please contact me if you would like to use this in a project. We can discuss the details.